


Picture My Burning Heart

by ArcticLucie, Cereith



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Angst, Blasto Fluff, Cheating, Collaboration, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, Friends to Lovers, Hamster Fluff, Kaidan needs a hug, M/M, Mutual Pining, Self-Esteem Issues, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, mShenko
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-25
Updated: 2017-02-23
Packaged: 2018-04-11 04:02:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 29,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4420547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArcticLucie/pseuds/ArcticLucie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cereith/pseuds/Cereith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John Shepard is a small time newspaper owner and is looking for a new roommate after helping his best friend, Garrus, move into his girlfriend's place. He interviews potential candidates and it just so happens one of them turns out to be an attractive firefighter named Kaidan Alenko. Will they give in to their undeniable attraction to one another or will Kaidan's wife extinguish the spark before it has a chance to catch fire?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Call It Fate

**Author's Note:**

> So Cereith and I were musing one day and realized we both had an idea for Shepard and Kaidan being oblivious pining idiots who for whatever reason ended up being roommates. And voila, this happened. We've never done a collab before, so this is very much an experiment for both of us. The chapters will probably be split up randomly. The first two are Cereith's then we'll see what happens after that. Enjoy! -Lucie
> 
> Lika ArchLucie said. Somehow we had the same idea and figured we should collab together. This is all new territory for the both of us, but so far i'd say we're doing fine. I think it might be because I consider ArchLucie a great friend as well as a nice person to muse with over MShenko. We hope you enjoy this fic of ours!! -Cereith :)
> 
> Questions, comments, Kudos? 
> 
> Thank you!

**Kaidan**

 

Kaidan was outright exhausted by the time he left the station. Call it luck or fate, but traffic was good on the drive home for once so he was able to get there a lot earlier than normal. He noticed a peculiar looking car parked across the street as he pulled into his driveway but didn't think much of it at the time. He parked outside the garage because his wife, Rahna, had already parked her car inside. Shutting off the car's ignition, he got out and made his way to the front door, briefly stopping to pick up the mail on his way in.

He skimmed through the various envelopes, all the bills he placed on the nearby table, until he reached what he was looking for. The latest issues of the Normandy News, a small time news magazine that he subscribed to. He always looked forward to reading each week's issue. Kaidan placed the magazine inside his duffle bag filled with clothes he used to change at work for him to read at a later time.

“Hun, I’m home,” he called out as he took off his bag and put it down on the hallway floor leading to the kitchen. Opening the fridge door, he grabbed a bottle of his favorite beer and took a swig of it to refresh his tired body. It had been a long day at work with back to back fire calls, and he was hoping to relax on the couch and watch a movie.

“Rahna, are you up there?” Kaidan called out again as he approached the staircase leading up to their bedroom. Instead of hearing a reply Kaidan heard soft feminine laughter emanating from his bedroom along with a masculine voice. “What the—?”

He slowly climbed the stairs careful not to make a sound. He tried to tell himself he was hearing things, that it was just the television, as he crept down the hall to the bedroom door. It was slightly opened, but there was no mistaking that the small moans coming from the other side were Rahna's. Kaidan splayed his palm over the door to inch it open.

Kaidan stood dumbfounded as he took in the scene before him. Rahna was straddling an unknown man’s thighs as she eagerly kissed him. The man was kneading her breasts eliciting those small moans from her as she rolled her hips.

Kaidan couldn't move, couldn't make a sound at the absolute treachery he took in with wide-eyed horror. He came back to himself as the bottle he was holding crashed to the ground spreading its contents over the expensive hardwood floor.

“What the hell is going on here?” Kaidan croaked out in anguish.

“K-kaidan!” Rahna quickly scrambled for something to cover her exposed torso. “Y-you're home early!”

“I left early!” Kaidan desperately tried to maintain control but he couldn’t win against all the overwhelming emotions she caused him in that moment. “Now, what the fuck is going on here!”

“Hey, man let's just calm down,” the stranger said, and Kaidan was appalled that he had the audacity to speak.

“You!” Kaidan indignantly pointed a finger at him. “Out of my house!”

“Kaidan, don’t be rude to Vyrnnus.” Oh. Fuck. No! She had the nerve to lecture him?

“I said, OUT!” Kaidan ignored his adulterant wife in favor of yelling at Vyrnnus.

Vyrnnus hurriedly gathered his clothes and ran out the bedroom to avoid Kaidan’s impending wrath. Kaidan heard him painfully curse as he stepped on the broken glass from his bottle, causing a brief moment of triumph in Kaidan.

Silence loomed over them both, the only thing that was heard was Kaidan’s panting breaths and Rahna’s nervous fidgeting. With all the control he could muster, he spoke first. “I want a divorce.”

“What?” Rahna’s stricken face furthered his resolve.

“I want a divorce,” he repeated through gritted teeth as his heart shattered, like the beer bottle before him, at the sheer and utter betrayal from his wife of four years.

“N-now Kaidan, w-we can talk about this,” she stuttered out when Kaidan moved towards the closet.

“No! I want the divorce.” Kaidan opened the closet door to take out a suitcase and inefficiently pack whatever clothes he could grab in both his hands. He briefly stopped to look inside a box containing some of his items. Rummaging through it, he found the small black silk covered box he was looking for and stuffed it into his pants pocket. Kaidan zipped up the suitcase and got up to leave.

“What are you doing?” Rahna’s saddened voice cut through him, and for a moment, he thought he might falter.

But he looked between the rumpled sheets, his disheveled wife, and the broken glass and knew deep down in the depths of his soul that it was over. They were just too broken to be salvaged.

“I’m leaving!” he thundered.

“Please, don't do this,” she begged, “We can work it out, go back to the therapist.”

“No,” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in an attempt to ward off an oncoming migraine. “I'm tired, Rahna...I'm just so tired...and I'm done. _We_ are done.”

“Where will you go?” She started to delicately sob, but he didn't have the heart to care. She'd ripped it right out of his chest and stomped all over it.

“I’ll figure it out.” Kaidan left the bedroom and went down the stairs to grab his duffle bag and leave his home, for what might be the last time.

He half-heartedly threw his bags into the backseat then got into the driver side of the car. Kaidan ignored his soon-to-be ex-wife when she stepped out of the house to stop him and peeled out of the driveway.

Driving gave him back a sense of control over what just happened. He drove to the nearest hotel and checked into a room for the night. He went in and dropped his bags containing his meager belongs by the door. In the morning he would ask Ashley if she knew of anyone he could stay with until he found a new place to live. But for now, he just wanted to be alone. 

Kaidan sat at the foot of the bed as the emotions from before came crashing back into him. Without anger to help aid him, Kaidan felt the full force of his broken heart. He hunched himself over and sobbed into his hands, hoping for some of his pain to evaporate along with his tears.

The minutes passed as Kaidan tried to gain back his composure. He moved up the bed to lay his head on the plush pillow that offered little comfort to his demolished heart. He couldn't be bothered to take off his clothes.

He carefully took out the small box he grabbed and placed it on the nightstand, his most prized possession, but didn’t have the strength to even look at it in the moment.

Kaidan rolled over to face the window so he could stare out into the night sky, cloudy and starless, an ugly purplish hue instead of crisp midnight blue. A storm was brewing outside, but there was another raging full well inside of him.

That night Kaidan cried himself to sleep.

_-_

When he woke up the next morning the sky was colored a dreadful shade of gray, as if the day was mirroring his mood. He got up from his bed and went over to his suitcase to get a change of clothes for after his shower.

Once his small moment of reprieve was over, he grabbed his cell phone from his duffle bag and called Ashley to tell her what had happened the night before.

Ashley, for the most part, remained silent. When he finished talking she didn’t assault him with endless questions like he had expected. There was only one.

“Do you need a place to stay? I have an extra room you could use,” Ashley offered.

“That’d be great Ash, but I think I’ll just stay at a hotel until I find a place.” Kaidan wasn’t about to dump his burdens onto Ashley. Their work life was stressfull enough without him adding more to her home life

“Where are you now?” He could hear rustling on her end of the line, presumably her getting changed to go out.

“At the hotel just down the street from my place.” It’d be a while before he stopped referring to his old household as ‘his’.

“I know the one, I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

“Wait, what?” He wasn’t heard as the line on the other end cut out.

Sure enough ten minutes later, Ashley was knocking on his door.

“Come on, I'm starving. Let's go get breakfast,” Ashley said as she knelt down to pick up his duffle bag and suitcase to carry them out of his room. The 'You're staying with me' was implyed. 

Kaidan unenthusiastically followed. By that point, he was too numb to argue.

_-_

**A month later**

 

**John**

 

Shepard was not looking forward to the interviews at all. None of the applicants seemed too promising for a roommate, but he couldn't afford the place on his salary alone, so hopefully one of them would be suitable enough.

His friend Garrus offered to help him out with the interviews. It was the least he could do after he moved out of their bachelor pad and into Tali’s love nest.

“Shepard!” Garrus called out from the kitchen as he was getting them a beer. “So what’s on the agenda for today?”

“We have three interviews today.” Shepard brought up the list of interviewees on datapad and read them off to Garrus. “Uhm, Conrad Verner, Morinth—the lack of a last name concerns me—and a Kaidan Alenko.”

Garrus came back with a bottle of beer for Shepard and traded him for the pad. “So, a store clerk, a musician, and a firefighter? I don’t know Shepard.” Garrus’s skeptical tone was not the least bit comforting. “It's going to be hard to find you a roommate as handsome and good looking as me,” he teased.

“I’m not looking for good-looking roommates, Garrus. Just someone to help out with the bills.”

“Are you saying you weren't using me for my body?” Garrus feigned hurt.

“No, I was using you for your wallet,” Shepard chuckled at his friend’s stunned expression.

“Ouch.”

A few moments later their first interviewee arrived. Conrad Verner was…well, in a three words, less than professional.

“Dudes, this place is saaweet!” Conrad looked around the apartment in amazement almost tripping over himself as he sat down. “You should throw one hellavu a party in here or something when I move in.”

Garrus flashed Shepard an amused look. Shepard ignored him as he looked over the horribly handwritten details on the application. “So Conrad, you said on your application that you’re a store clerk.” 

“What's that like?” Garrus asked.

“Dudes, it's so laaame! My father got me that gig. Said I need to make something of myself and stop living off of him. That's why I'm here, to get out from under his thumb, maybe try to have a go at my passion.”

“And that would be what exactly?” Shepard asked, the subtle scent of cannabis starting to irritate his nostrils.

“I'm gonna be a pro skateboarder, dudes. Straight up rolling, all day and all night, Tony Hawk style, bro. Y'know what I'm saying?" he laughed. “Or an entrepreneur...I've been building a little business back behind the store.”

“Is it legal?” Shepard asked, not really wanting to know.

“What?” Conrad’s head lulled back as he started to drift off.

“Are you high?” Shepard and Garrus asked at the same time.

Conrad's head jolted up. “Could I interest you gentlemen in an rad investment opportunity?”

“Ok, Verner. Let’s get you a cab and get you home ok.” Garrus helped Conrad to his feet and guiding the stoner out of the apartment.

As they were leaving, Shepard could hear Conrad speak. “Dude, I’m hungry. You got anything to eat...or smoke?”

After Conrad was on his way back home, Shepard opened up some of the windows to air out the apartment. As an added measure, he sprayed down the seat where Conrad had sat. A moment later, the next applicant came strolling in without having bothered to knock. A woman clad in black, high inch heals, and black leather gloves going up to her elbows.

“Hello, you must be Morinth.” For a split second Shepard hoped the woman would say no and leave.

“Yes, that’s what I go by.” Oh well, can’t win them all.

“So you’re a musician, huh?” Garrus asked from behind Shepard, eyeing the woman as if she were a threat. “How’s that like?”

“Like freedom from the bonds of oppression this world imposses on us all.”

“What kind of music do you play?” Shepard asked, more out of morbid curiosity than anything.

“Mmmh, I love the creations of Expel 10.” She fluttered her eyes closed like she was recalling something. “It speaks to me.”

Now Shepard was the one glaring at her. “It speaks to you?” 

“Yes, it speaks to my soul,” she started, babbling incoherencies. “Dark, blood-curdling screams reaching deep inside my chest to fill it with life, to connect me to the universe. Death brings life, pain is love, darkness is the only light around us. 

“Oookay,” Garrus whispered, “I'm officially scared out of my mind.”

“Do you like halix? I do my best writing while my mind is free from the constraints of the conscious world. And you don't mind if my band practices here, do you? The balcony up there seems perfect for our set up,” she inquired.

“Ok Morinth, it was nice, ah, meeting you but—“ Shepard not too gently leading her towards the apartment door, “...the vacancy has already been filled.”

“It's for the best. You were boring me anyway,” she scoffed over her shoulder.

Once the door was closed and she was gone, the deadbolt engaged just in case, Garrus looked over at Shepard and said, “Excuse me while I make a call to the authorities.”

Shepard sighed as he flopped on the couch. It seemed only the stoners and axe murders saw his ad in his paper. Well, he still had one more interview to get through and they were a civil servant, so maybe there was hope for him yet.

When Garrus came back, they sat on the couch and waited for their final candidate. Either the person didn’t get the times right or they were just unpunctual because it had been well passed 30 minutes since they were supposed to show up. 

“Maybe we should just turn this one down by default.” Shepard wasn’t too keen on the lateness. 

“The person's a firefighter, Shepard.” Garrus was being unusually hopeful. “They probably got caught up at work.” 

“Yeah, you're probably—“ He stopped as the door bell rang signaling a new guest. “Finally...but I'm taking points off for tardiness,” he quipped.

Shepard got up from the couch to answer the door while Garrus was content to stay put sipping his beer. He undid the locks and gripped the door handle, slowly opening it just in case it was Morinth making a triumphant return.

“You know you're l—“ Shepard's breath caught in his throat at the sight of the man before him. Kaidan Alenko should have sent a picture ahead of time so that Shepard’s heart wouldn’t've skipped a beat when they met. Shepard prided himself on his excellent eye for aesthetics, he had to be for his photography, and that right there was beauty incarnate. 

Kaidan had a perfectly proportioned body with broad shoulders, full kissable lips he just wanted a taste of, and obsidian hair perfectly sculpted atop his head. But the eyes! Oh god, his eyes were the most stunning shade of whiskey, and Shepard wanted nothing more than to get drunk in them, to drink them up, to drowned in their splender.

“You’re—“ Shepard had to swallow a couple times before he could get his voice to cooperate. “You’re, uh, Kaidan Alenko, right?” _Please, please say yes!_  Let him win this once.

“Yeah, that’s me.” Jesus Christ his voice was like the sweet sound of honey. “I’m sorry I’m late I got caught up at work.”

“It's fine.” It took Shepard a moment to realize he hadn’t invited Kaidan in yet. “Uhm, come in. Have a seat...Do you want something to drink. Beer, water?”

Shepard smelt the faintest hint of smoke wafting through the air as Kaidan walked by him. It was so much better than whatever Conrad Verner had been marinading in. As Kaidan walked up to greet Garrus, Shepard couldn't help but take in the view of his stellar ass because, as Garrus would've said before he met Tali, 'that booty was out of this world!'

“No, thanks. I’m still on the job.” Kaidan said in the succulent voice of his.

Was Shepard developing an attraction to his possible-new-roommate? No, he was not, he was already too far gone. 

“Right, of course.” Shepard went over to sit on the couch across from Kaidan. He had evidently been staring at him for too long because Garrus elbowed him in the side prompting him to speak. “Uh right, sorry. It says on your application you’re a firefighter?”

Shepard didn’t pay much attention to what Kaidan was actually saying. He couldn't, not when he was being hypnotized by those juicy looking lips forming the words that could've been Russian for all he knew. He couldn't exactly hear him in his daze. Garrus caught him staring again and nudged him a little harder this time.

“Uh, and uh what can you contribute?” Shepard asked, not really caring what the answer would be.

Those lips were once again mesmerizing him. He moved his gaze upward to those caramel colored eyes, he wanted to lose himself in those eyes. He was willing to stare into them for eternity, and he might've if it hadn't been for his friend. Like clockwork, Garrus jostled him once more and urged him to speak.

Shepard should've turned him away, stopped himself from having Kaidan as his roommate. Anything else was just unacceptable. He couldn't be attracted to someone he lived with. It just wouldn’t be fair for either of them. He should've just said no, he should've told him the vacancy had been filled, he should've—

“So, when can you move in?”


	2. Moving Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard ogles Kaidan when he moves into the apartment. Kaidan has a hard time believing Ash's observations of his new roommate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for all the lovely comments and kudos on chapter one! We are thrilled you guys want to see more of this. Enjoy chapter two!
> 
> (FYI, their apartment is the one in the Citadel dlc for reference.)

**John**

 

A slow grueling week later, Shepard waited for Kaidan so he could help him move his things up to his room. He didn’t wait long as his apartment doorbell rang signaling Kaidan’s arrival. Shepard nearly ran towards the door in his excitement to see the attractive firefighter again. A huge grin spread across his face as he opened the door to see Kaidan Alenko in all his stunning glory standing at his doorstep, _their doorstep_ , once again. Shepard patted himself on the back for remembering to breathe this time around, however the same couldn’t be said for his fluttering heart.

 

“Hey, Kaidan.” Somehow he managed to sound causal. “I didn’t know if you’d be late or not. It’s nice to see you again.”

 

“You too, Shepard.” Fuck, that silky smooth voice of his sent a jolt of heat right through his body. Shepard worried at how badly he missed the sound of it this past week. “I took the day off so I could settle in.”

 

“Good to know.” Yes, so Shepard would get the whole day to spend with Kaidan. He’d get to help him settle in, maybe he’d get to show him around the neighborhood, and then finally relax on the couch as they watched the game with a nice cold beer in hand. Today was going to be—

 

“Shepard, I’d like you to meet my friend.” Kaidan stepped to the side to allow a woman Shepard didn’t notice was there come into view. “Shepard this is Ashley, Ashley this is Shepard, the guy I told you about.”

 

“Nice to meet you, Shepard.” The woman, Ashley, was all poised and sleek. Her smooth, stark black hair going beyond her shoulders was a thing of beauty. “Kaidan’s been talking about you and the apartment nonstop. It's nice to put a face to the name.”

 

“All good things I hope.” Kaidan had been talking about him? If it were just about the apartment that would be understandable since he’d be living there and all, but he also talked about him? Well, he was going to be his roommate so it made sense, right?

 

“Yeah, mostly.” Ashley walked up to Kaidan and put her arm around his shoulder. “Now let’s get this guy moved in.”

 

Shepard found himself envious of how close the two seemed to be. He hoped that he could be that close to Kaidan one day. Damn it! Maybe having Kaidan move in with him wasn’t such a good idea. He was getting jealous of his friend for gods' sake. God help him if he found out Kaidan had a girlfriend or something, but then she would probably be here in place of Ashley. So it was probably safe to assume he didn't have one.

 

“I’ll head down with you. Where’s your car parked?” Shepard asked as he quickly went to the table near the door to grab his keys in case they got locked out.

 

“We’re parked just out front. It's not a lot, just a few boxes.” Kaidan started to walk down the hall with Ashley and Shepard by his side. “I didn’t bring anything big like a bed or dresser. Hope that's not a problem.”

 

“Well good, the bedroom is already fully furnished,” Shepard said.

 

All three of them headed downstairs to Kaidan’s parked car. Looking in, Shepard saw that there were a total of four boxes. If one of them carried two of the boxes, then they could finish this all in one trip. Ashley went over and opened up the car to grab one of the boxes then Kaidan went and grabbed two of the others, leaving one more for Shepard.

 

Shepard froze where he stood when he saw Kaidan’s muscles flexing as he lifted the boxes. The way his hands firmly gripped them, the way his shirt seemed to strain against his bulging biceps, and that little low grunt from Kaidan all sent a shot of arousal straight to Shepard’s groin.

 

“Shepard,” Kaidan's succulent voice broke through his aroused state. “Mind grabbing that last one.”

 

Shepard bit back a low moan as he said, “Sure.”

 

With each of them carrying Kaidan’s belongings, they headed back inside. The elevator was out of order so they had to take the stairs to his floor. Shepard cursed the building maintenance as they ascended up the stairway, his eyes drifting down Kaidan’s flawless form all the way to that perfectly sculpted ass.

 

Still in his stupor Shepard tripped as he missed a step, but he caught himself and the box at the last possible second.

 

“Shepard?” Kaidan’s voice was etched with concern. “You ok?”

 

“Yeah, just lost my footing.” Shepard shot him a reassuring smile and continued on.

 

They made it to the apartment and settled Kaidan’s things against the wall opposite the stairs. Shepard glanced at the small bead of sweat falling from Kaidan’s forehead, down his cheek, and then teasingly reaching his neck to stay on his pulse point. Shepard desperately wanted to lick that little drop of sweat off.

 

“So Shepard, did you have any other applicants besides Kaidan?” Ashley asked bringing him out of his daze.

 

“Uh, yeah a couple, but they weren’t really…. appropriate,” Shepard said as he peered over her shoulder at Kaidan kneeling by his boxes of possessions.

 

“Appropriate?” Ashley didn't seem to notice that Shepard was staring at Kaidan.

 

“Yeah, one was a stoner and the other was a scary looking Goth chick.” Shepard tried to get a better view of Kaidan as he started to carry his boxes up to his room two at a time. Those flexing muscles teasing Shepard.

 

“I’ve had a few weird ones myself when I was looking for roommates.” Ashley still appeared oblivious to Shepard ogling her friend. “I remember this one woman wore all black and these weird looking gloves. I was fine with her but then she asked if I liked helix or halix or something like that. Then she started saying these weird things.” Ashley shivered slightly at the memory. “She scared the crap out of me so I turned her away.”

 

The way Ashley described the person made Shepard wonder, “Was her name Morinth?” 

 

“Yeah. You know her?” Ashley asked shocked.

 

“She was the other applicant I mentioned.” Shepard was slightly frightened by the memory of Morinth. “I’m glad I turned her away, she scared my friend Garrus so bad he threatened to call the authorities, and if I hadn’t gone with my gut, Kaidan wouldn’t be the one moving in.”

 

“Well I’m glad you did too.” Ashley turned her head in Kiadan's direction, now taking up his final two boxes. “Kaidan needed a place to stay, and he didn’t want to keep staying at my place so I’m happy he found your ad in the paper.”

 

At that, Shepard wondered why Kaidan would need a place to stay and why he wouldn’t just stay with Ashley. He was tempted to ask, but didn’t as Kaidan sauntered down the stairs. Sweat now glistening on his forehead from carrying all those boxes up the staircase.

 

“Alright, I’m all moved in,” Kaidan sighed. He used his arm to rub away some of the excess sweat from his brow. “Ready for me to drive you home Ash?”

 

“Yep, Shepard and I were just talking.” Ashley faced Shepard and extended a hand. “Again it was nice meeting you Shepard. Watch out for Kaidan, ok?”

 

“I will,” Shepard said as he gripped her hand. Surprisingly, it was firmer than he would have expected.

 

“I’ll be back Shepard.” Kaidan shot him a small wave as him and Ashley headed out the door.

 

“Oh hold on a minute, Kaidan.” Shepard went to the nearby table and grabbed the extra set of keys. “Here, your own set of keys.”

 

“Thanks Shepard.” Kaidan’s hand brushed against his as he grabbed the keys. The feel of Kaidan's skin against his almost made him whimper for more. “Do you need me to bring back anything?”

 

“No, we’re good here.” Shepard sent him a small smile.

 

Kaidan nodded at him and headed out the door to take Ashley home.

 

So the day didn’t turn out the way he hoped it would, but at least he would be seeing a lot more of Kaidan.

 

_-_

 

**Kaidan**

 

Once they were on the road, Ashley started her commentary about the apartment and about Shepard. She tagged along so she could help him settle in, but her true reason was to get a look at where he would be living and with whom.

 

“The apartment is incredible, K,” Ashley said from the passenger side of the car.

 

She was right; the apartment was incredible with its two bedrooms on the second floor and large living space. Not to mention the spectacular kitchen which Kaidan was already looking forward to using. The location of the apartment wasn’t too far from the station so he didn’t have to file to get transferred. In fact the apartment was about the same distance away as his old house, only it was in the complete opposite direction. Which also meant it was in a completely different neighborhood; he would have to rely on Shepard to get to know their area.

 

“You’re lucky you get to live there! Everyone in town wants to live in the Tiberius Towers. I heard there was a two year waiting list just to get put on the _actual_ waiting list,” Ashley continued. “And did you check out that view?”

 

“How could I have missed it with those huge windows?”

 

“Speaking of nice views, Shepard is not so bad either. I kind of like the guy,” she smirked.

 

“Yeah, Shepard is great,” Kaidan spared a glance in her direction.

 

“You sure you can handle the whole roommate thing after…you know.” Ashley didn’t like bringing up the ‘Rahna Issue’ as they so dubbed it; she knew it was still a sore spot for Kaidan.

 

“We’re both adults not a couple of teens, Ash, and it was either this or live somewhere farther away, forcing me to transfer to a new station. We both don’t want that,” he sighed, “I honestly thought he wouldn’t consider me to be his roommate. What with me being late and all, he also didn’t seem all that interested in me during the interview.”

 

Ashley snorted at that. “It didn’t seem like that from where I was standing.”

 

“What do you mean?” Kaidan turned to her as they stopped at a red light.

 

“I mean, he couldn’t take his eyes off of you Kaidan,” Ashley lightly shoved his shoulder. “Don’t tell me you didn’t notice your extremely attractive looking new roommate was eyeing you.”

 

“Well, not really.” Kaidan turned back and waited for the light to change. “He is attractive, I’ll give you that.”

 

Attractive was a drastic understatement. Shepard was…. well he was handsome, good-looking, and unexpectedly appealing to Kaidan. It wasn't the first time he stared at a guy before and thought they were hot. The idea of being with a man didn’t bother him. He had just never been with a guy before because he had been dating Rahna since they were teenagers, and then they got married right after he graduated from the fire academy.

 

“Hell yeah, that man’s attractive. Kaidan, I think he might be into you.” Ashley sent him a wry smile. She knew of his appeal to guys and that he never acted on them, maybe this was her way of encouraging him. The light turned green signaling for him to go.

 

“Come on Ash. I don’t think he’s into me the way you think he is.” Because how could somebody be into him, let alone find him anywhere near being attractive. No, Ashley was wrong, Shepard wasn’t into him because how could anybody like him that way?

 

For that matter, how could anybody love him when his own wife didn't?

 

“All I’m saying is that he wasn’t looking at me.” Ashley shot him one last little smirk before she turned back in her seat. They remained silent the rest of the way to her house. Within that time, Kaidan thought briefly about Shepard, although whenever he did, his mind wondered to the man's bright blue eyes which made the sky pale in comparison on any given day.

 

A few minutes passed by and they arrived at Ashley’s place. She got out of the car and closed the door but didn't make to go inside yet. Instead, she leaned down and peered inside the open window.

 

“I’m sad to see you go, K.” Ashley looked it too. The past month she’d been a godsend to Kaidan. She truly was the best friend anyone could have.

 

“You have my number Ash, and you’ll be seeing me at work,” Kaidan chuckled.

 

“Yeah, but it's not the same,” she sighed and stood up straight as she took a step back from the car. “Drive home safe.”

 

Kaidan waved at her as he drove down the road and made to go back to his new home, his new home with Shepard. He’d decided to make a quick stop to pick up a nice bottle of Renegade Red Wine as a gift on the way back to their apartment.

 

It didn’t take him much longer to get home after that. He parked his car upfront like he did when he arrived with Ashley and got out. It wasn’t hard to figure out what keys opened what so he arrived upstairs quickly. Once inside he saw Shepard lounging on a couch with a bottle of beer in his hand. Shepard turned his head and smiled at Kaidan.

 

“Hey, welcome back,” Shepard said as he raised his bottle of beer towards Kaidan. “There’s cold beer in the fridge if you want one.”

 

“Thanks Shepard,” Kaidan went over to the fridge and grabbed a fresh cold bottle of beer. “My favorite brand, nice!”

 

“Want to watch the game with me?” Shepard asked.

 

“I’d like to Shepard,” Kaidan took a quick sip of his beer, “but I should unpack first.”

 

“Oh right of course.” Shepard looked slightly disappointed. “Let me know if you need anything.”

 

“I will.” Kaidan went over to the staircase and headed upstairs to his room.

 

Once he was inside, he took a moment to reflect. This was where he was going to live for then on. The past month he stayed in Ashley’s extra room and he didn’t like to be a freeloader so he offered to pay her for it, but she refused. Now he had his own space and felt that he was contributing something to someone. Kaidan was glad that someone happened to be Shepard.

 

He went over to his boxes of belongings that were placed near the foot of the bed. Kaidan grabbed one of the boxes and placed it on top the bed. The box contained most of his clothes already folded. Taking them out of the box, he went over to the dresser and put them inside.

 

When he was done with that he opened up the next two boxes containing his toiletries and room essentials. One of the boxes contained his laptop that Ashley so graciously went back for at his old place. He remembered Ashley saying that she got into it with Rahna when she went to pick it up. Kaidan apologized for bringing her into his mess, however Ashley only brushed it off by saying “It’s what friends do, Kaidan.”

 

The last box didn’t have a lot. Only his duffle bag and the change of clothes he took to the station as well as some work items he had. When he took those out he saw it. That black silk covered box containing his most precious possession. Kaidan grabbed the box and sighed as he sat on the floor near the foot of the bed.

 

He stared at the box for what seemed like an eternity while he gathered up the strength he needed to open it and gaze upon its contents. With a cleansing breath, Kaidan placed his hand over the lid to lift it up and reveal—

 

“Kaidan,” Shepard’s voice from the other side of the door startled Kaidan making him shut the lid of the silk covered box before he jammed it back into the box he grabbed it from. “I was wondering if you wanted to order out for dinner?”

 

“Yeah that'd be great.” Kaidan closed the cardboard box and pushed it under the bed then got up to open the door. “I’m done unpacking, so I could go for a bite to eat.”

 

“Oh ok, I know this place called Apollo’s Café you might enjoy. The menu's online if you'd like to take a look and see if they have anything you'd like to order,” Shepard said.

 

“Sounds good, Shepard.” Kaidan said.

 

They ordered from the café Shepard recommended and sat on the couch. Once their order arrived they sat in comfortable silence watching the TV screen and eating their meals.

 

Every so often Kaidan chanced a glance in Shepard’s direction.

 

Kaidan was strangely looking forward to living with Shepard, but he didn’t know exactly why. Ashley’s off handed comment about Shepard liking him kept nagging at him because….it wasn’t true, he knew it and that hurt something deep within him.

 

Because....

 

Who could love him?


	3. Night Owls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard and Kaidan bond over midnight snacks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay this is my first chapter and hopefully I can maintain the awesomeness that my wonderful friend Cereith has started. Enjoy! -Lucie
> 
> Hello, ok so I wanted to add in that Lucie and I came up with a posting system. We'll each do two chapters, so basically the next chapter will again be Lucie's then the next two will be me again. Alright on with the chapter!! -Cereith
> 
> **Spoiler warning: this chapter contains major Doctor Who spoilers, because we're nerds and so are Shepard and Kaidan. It's been a year, but still thought I'd warn for it just in case.

**Kaidan**

 

"Uh, I think I'm going to bed," Kaidan said as he stood from the couch once the game was over. He was happy to turn in early on his first night in the apartment. He and Shepard didn't do much talking as they watched the game and the atmosphere had started to feel slightly awkward.

 

He was sure Shepard was a nice guy, Ashley approved him, though he still wasn't convinced of her ridiculous 'observations.' There was a reason she became a firefighter and not a cop. Nonetheless, it was quite odd sitting next to a complete stranger knowing he would be sleeping right down the hall from him that night. Even a hot one like Shepard, but the beer helped.

 

"Yeah, me too," Shepard said, standing as well. He stretched his arms above his head and Kaidan refused to acknowledge the flash of toned abs that became visible when his shirt rode up.

 

“Well...goodnight, Shepard.”

 

“Sleep well, Kaidan.”

 

With that, he headed upstairs. There was a gym set up in the bedroom downstairs so Shepard had given him the room right next to his. Kaidan was used to something a bit bigger having only lived in houses before, but he’d make due.

 

At least he had his own bathroom. He striped and jumped in the shower. He was used to quick ones from working at the station, but the water pressure was so nice that he took a little longer than usual.

 

It gave him time to reflect on his new roommate.

 

His first impressions of Shepard were that he was laid back, kind, and judging by all the artwork on the walls, he assumed he was into art. He mentioned something about working at a news agency of some sort, but Kaidan didn’t want to pry on the first day. Those eyes were just stunning, though. He made sure not to look directly at them because he was afraid he’d get sucked into them. It was obvious from the small glimpse of his abs—which Kaidan was still refusing to acknowledge—that he worked out quite a bit.

 

Kaidan couldn’t deny that he was attractive and he couldn’t help the stirring in his loins at the thought of what it would be like to have those full lips on his.

 

But he was never going to find out.

 

Shepard was light years out of his league, and even if he wasn’t, Kaidan couldn’t manage to keep his wife happy and satisfied. How could he expect to make anyone else happy? He was a lost cause and he knew it. Apparently his neglected cock knew it too as the slight erection he had fizzled out. It was just as well; fantasizing about his new roommate in the shower would just be setting himself up for disappointment.

 

After his shower, he decided to try and go to sleep. He wasn’t that tired, but he did have a shift tomorrow.

 

He tossed and turned, watching the digital clock go from 9:47 to 11:58. It was all but useless. He threw the covers off and climbed out of bed. Maybe a snack would help. Shepard had said to help himself to the fridge.

 

As quietly as possible, he inched his door open and peered down the hall. Shepard’s door was shut and it looked like the light was off. He had contemplated throwing on a pair of pants but decided not to. His boxer-briefs and tank top would have to do.

 

He tiptoed down the stairs to the kitchen. The fridge was well stocked with juices and fruits, a lot of healthy options. He grabbed the bottle of apple juice and started rooting around for a glass, but his hand accidentally slipped on one of the cabinets and it slammed shut. He winced at the sound but hoped it wasn’t too loud. Waking his roommate on his first night there would’ve been humiliating.

 

He finally found the glasses and poured him some juice. He went to put up the juice bottle in the fridge, but when he shut the door, he let out a shriek of terror.

 

Shepard had snuck up on him and was on the other side of the refrigerator door. “Spirits! You scared me!” Kaidan shouted, almost dropping his glass.

 

“You scared me! I thought you were an intruder,” Shepard said, chest heaving, he himself having looked frightened at Kaidan’s shock. “Maybe Morinth coming back to take her revenge,” he chuckled.

 

Then Kaidan noticed the blue light Shepard was still shining on him, eyes zeroing in on it, “Is...is that a sonic screwdriver?”

 

Shepard quickly released the button on the screwdriver and the light went off. The kitchen was dark, but he could just make out the coy smile on Shepard’s face. “Maybe.”

 

“Your home defense system consists of what, blinding people with sonic screwdrivers?” Kaidan couldn’t help but laugh.

 

“It was, uh, next to my gun?” Shepard shrugged, “Must’ve grabbed it by mistake.”

 

“Uh huh.” He hid a smirk behind his juice cup as he tried to think about something other than how adorable that was.

 

“Wait...you know what this is?”

 

“Of course I do, Shepard. Doesn’t everybody?” he asked. _Everybody but Rahna,_ he thought. He could never get her to watch his favorite show with him.

 

“I would hope so, but you’d be surprised. My ex didn’t,” Shepard said, moving around him to open the fridge so he could get out the juice. He turned around and reached in the cabinet for a glass.

 

It was in that moment that Kaidan realized Shepard only had on a pair of boxer-briefs, the outline of his ass backlit by the faint light coming in through the windows in the living room. He swallowed hard at that bit of information and forced himself to look away.

 

He was not going to start ogling his new roommate!

 

Too fucking late.

 

“I like to think it was why we broke up. How could I date someone who didn’t know what a sonic screwdriver was? It just wouldn’t work,” Shepard continued before turning back to him and taking a huge gulp of his juice, licking his lips when he was done.

 

Living with this man was going to kill him.

 

“Kaidan?”

 

“Hmm? What?”

 

“You spaced out there for a second. I asked if you would like a banana? Potassium is supposed to be good for sleep regulation.”

 

“Yes, thank you.” _Way not to look like an idiot,_ he internally chided.

 

Kaidan caught the banana Shepard tossed to him before watching him break off his own. He had a very difficult time keeping the inappropriate thoughts from flooding in as he watched Shepard take a bite of the phallic shaped food.

 

Gods, he needed a distraction….

 

“Okay, which Doctor is your favorite?” Kaidan asked, mirroring Shepard as he peeled his banana and took a bite.

 

Shepard sighed wistfully, “Definitely Ten. Tennant was brilliant, still miss him.”

 

“Mine too!”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yeah, I mean I like Eleven and Twelve as well, but Ten has my heart,” Kaidan grinned. He couldn’t believe Shepard was into Doctor Who. He had started to think he was the only Whovian in town.

 

“Mine too, and Rose! I just loved her.”

 

“I liked Rose too, but I think the best companion was Donna,” Kaidan argued before taking a bite.

 

“What? How is she better than Rose?” Shepard asked, crossing his toned arms over his chest.

 

Kaidan was trying very hard not to let his eyes roam over him as they adjusted to the light. “Okay, maybe ‘better’ wasn’t the right word. I just liked her, but I liked Rose too.”

 

“I think we might have to disagree on favorite companions...for now,” Shepard said, winking at him over the rim of his cup. Or maybe he just had something in his eye. “Couldn’t sleep?”

 

“Yeah, I guess I’m more of a night owl,” Kaidan confessed.

 

“I am as well. I have lots of late night deadlines so it’s more of a habit now than anything.”

 

Kaidan hoped he wasn’t coming off as being too nosy, but he couldn’t help but want to know more about the man he was now living with. That was reasonable, wasn’t it? “Deadlines?”

 

“Yes, I’m an editor for a little news magazine. The Normandy News, you’ve probably never heard of it,” Shepard said, shaking his head. He downed the rest of his juice and put his cup in the dishwasher before throwing his banana peel in the garbage. Kaidan did the same.

 

“Actually, I’m a subscriber,” he admitted as they exited the kitchen.

 

Shepard’s brow raised in surprise. “Seriously? You’re a subscriber? That’s awesome!”

 

Kaidan blushed at that. He wasn’t sure why he was shy about having a news magazine subscription. Maybe it was because Shepard was the editor. That was kind of a big deal to him. The Normandy News was acclaimed for its hard hitting and controversial pieces that other news organizations were afraid to publish, and that made Shepard a bit of a hero to him. He couldn't wait to get to the station and tell Ash.

 

“I never miss an issue, Shepard. Oh that reminds me? Do you know how I can update my address?”

 

“I can do it,” Shepard offered as they started upstairs.

 

“Are you sure you don’t mind?”

 

“Not at all. Is there anything else I can do to help your stay at Casa de Shepard more enjoyable?” he teased, tossing a smile over his shoulder at Kaidan.

 

He ignored the little flip flop in his tummy at the gesture. It was probably just his snack settling. Of course, keeping his eyes off the toned ass flexing in front of him with each step was harder to do. “No, I think I’m good Shepard.”

 

“Let me know if there is. Goodnight again,” he waved as they broke off to go to their separate rooms.

 

“Goodnight, Shepard.” Maybe now he’d be able to sleep.

 

_-_

 

**John**

 

John didn’t sleep well that night. His mind was more at ease after his midnight chat with Kaidan, but up to that point he was feeling guilty about being attracted to the man sleeping in the room next to his. He hoped Kaidan hadn’t picked up on it. Kaidan was straight, he probably had a girlfriend, and the last thing he needed was his gay roommate drooling all over him like he was some hot piece of meat with delicious eyes and a body that poets wrote limericks about.

 

He probably shouldn’t bring up the gay thing. Garrus was cool with living with a gay man, but he wasn’t sure where Kaidan stood on things like that. It was best to keep it to himself for the time being, just until he had a better sense of Kaidan’s views on things. After interviewing Conrad and Morinth, he knew he would have a hard time finding a better roommate than Kaidan Alenko. Scaring him off was just not an option, even though he technically didn't need a roommate. The apartment was a gift and already paid for, but no one needed to know that.

 

He'd never lived alone before—except for the month after his sister Jane took off to travel the world. He realized pretty quickly that he preferred having someone around all the time. Garrus had been a lifesaver to his sanity. He just hoped lightning had struck again with Kaidan.

 

A fitful sleep left him in more need of a cup of coffee than usual. He didn’t even bother hitting the snooze button because he knew he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep. Maybe Kaidan was an early riser too because as soon as he left his room, the heavenly aroma of coffee wrapped him in its warm embrace. When he made it downstairs, Kaidan was standing by the coffee machine with his back to him. He had on a tight light grey t-shirt that looked painted on and a pair of dark jeans that hugged his ass and thighs perfectly.

 

“You found the coffee?” he asked, holding back a snicker when Kaidan jumped and spun around at his words.

 

“Uh, not exactly,” Kaidan replied as he turned back to fill the mug he had in his hand. It was Shepard’s favorite, but he chose not to say anything...this time. “I had some in my bag from Ashley’s. I hope you don’t mind. Can I get you a glass, Shepard?”

 

“It wouldn’t happen to be Mindoir Mountain Roast, would it? That’s pretty much the only thing I drink. Tap a vein and it’ll come pouring out,” he laughed.

 

“You’re kidding, right? Please don’t tell me you drink that swill,” Kaidan smirked.

 

That smile did strange things to Shepard’s insides. “Swill? I’ll have you know it was the Normandy News’ top rated coffee brand for three years in a row,” he huffed.

 

“I know, I wrote letters to the editor...oh my god, was that you?” Kaidan’s face a flushed just a little.

 

Shepard nodded then descended into a fit of laughter that Kaidan soon joined in. Maybe he could learn to like mornings if they all started out with his roommate’s raspy laugh.

 

“So what brand is this?” Shepard asked, suspiciously sniffing the coffee pot.

 

“Gagarin Ground. It’s delicious! You should try some; you might be pleasantly surprised.”

 

And how could Shepard resist when those honey eyes were looking at him so hopefully. He was going to give it a try...but he wasn’t going to like it.

 

“Not bad,” he conceded after fixing him a cup. He proceeded to make his usual pb&j for lunch, buzzing around the kitchen while Kaidan chewed on a protein bar. “So how does your day look?”

 

“I have a shift today. It’s twenty-four hours so you won’t see me again until tomorrow morning. I hope that’s okay? We hadn’t really gotten a chance to talk about schedules,” Kaidan said, scratching his neck with that nervous tic of his.

 

“No, it’s fine. Thanks for telling me. Otherwise, I might’ve sent out the cavalry,” he chuckled as he finished packing his lunch for the day. "Is that what you're having for breakfast?"

 

"Yeah...I haven't gotten a chance to go shopping and didn't want to eat all your food."

 

"I really don't mind, Kaidan. I'll take you to the grocery store tomorrow. But for now, would you like a bowl of cereal?" Shepard had already gotten down the Blast-O's and two bowls.

 

"If you're sure you don't mind."

 

Shepard smiled and grabbed the milk from the fridge before sitting down at the island next to his roommate. They mostly ate in silence. He didn't like that they were back to the weird place in between awkward and comfortable, but he hoped that was just because they were still getting to know each other.

 

"So...favorite villain?" Shepard asked in an attempt to cut the awkward.

 

"Daleks, hands down," Kaidan said with a sideways smirk.

 

"Yeah, okay that was an easy one. I kind of like the Cybermen too, though. It might be cool to get some fancy cybernetic upgrades."

 

"Sure, but what about losing your humanity and your emotions?"

 

"So more Robocop than Cyberman… Although, on several occasions some people were able to retain their humanity even after the were 'upgraded,' " Shepard pointed out.

 

"Of course but that was rare and it didn't usually end well for any of them. They ended up dying to save the world."

 

"How is dying a noble death to save the world a bad thing?"

 

"I don’t know maybe because like Danny Pink you don't get your happily ever after with Clara Oswald?" Kaidan shrugged. “And who doesn’t love a happy ending?”

 

"Okay, you have me there because I would've cried like a baby if Rose Tyler hadn't gotten her Doctor in the end," Shepard admitted, but he decided to leave out the part out about it _actually_ making him cry of happiness instead.

 

“He was just a clone though, a cheap imitation of the real thing.”

 

“I wouldn’t say cheap. He was just as smart and shared the same life experiences as the real Doctor. He was just human not Time Lord. But it could’ve been worse, he could’ve been an evil clone.”

 

“Wow, we’re nerds, huh?” Kaidan chuckled.

 

“I guess it takes one to know one,” Shepard smiled. “I wonder what happened to them in the parallel universe.”

 

“Maybe he got a job in a shop somewhere and they have little mini Doctors running around.”

 

"And a fish named Stormageddon."

 

Kaidan eyed him while he swallowed his last mouthful of Blast-O's, "Why a fish?"

 

"As a fish lover, I can tell the tenth Doctor would like fish. You should check out the fish tank in my office sometime."

 

“I might do that.”

 

They soon finished breakfast and Shepard took their bowls to the sink to rinse out. He filled up his travel mug with Gagarin Ground. It would have to do until he converted Kaidan to Mindoir Mountain.

 

“Oh, I almost forgot.” Shepard dug out his phone from his pants pocket and stroked the touchscreen with his thumb. “Mind giving me your cell number?”

 

Kaidan eyed him as he stared at Shepard’s outstretched hand holding his phone. For a split second, he worried that Kaidan wouldn’t give it to him.

 

“Right!” Kaidan palmed his forehead. “I didn’t put my own number on the application. That was Ash’s home phone.”

 

Kaidan reached out and grabbed the cellphone from his hand. He didn’t miss the way his hand brushed against Kaidan’s, or the jolt of electricity that accompanied it.

 

“There you go,” Kaidan handed him back the cellphone once all his information was in it. “Sorry, I had to get a new phone so I put Ash’s home phone instead.”

 

“It’s fine. I just wanted to make sure I had it in case of emergencies,” Shepard said, pocketing his phone. “Why’d you have to get a new phone for?”

 

“I sort of...,” Kaidan started to rub the back of his neck nervously, “...threw my old one against a wall.”

 

Shepard laughed at that, “What did the wall do to you?”

 

“It’s a long story.” Kaidan’s mood turned south. Shepard guessed it was because he was remembering the reason he tossed his phone at the wall. Maybe he should steer clear of mentioning it again. Best to leave now before he ruined something else.

 

“I should go,” Shepard said, grabbing his lunch and coffee. “We have printer deadlines coming up in the next few days so it’s going to get a little crazy. Sometimes I have to bring my work home which also tends to lead to coworkers as well, I hope that’s okay.”

 

“Yeah, it’s your place,” Kaidan shrugged.

 

“Our place,” Shepard reminded him with a grin. “Be careful out there, uh...what’s your rank?”

 

“I’m a Lieutenant.”

 

“Lieutenant Alenko. I like it. Stay safe. I’ll text you if anything comes up.”

 

“You better.”

 

Shepard hurried out of the apartment after that. He really needed to get to work, but he was also afraid that if he stayed any longer, he would barricade them in his kitchen so they could never leave. He could get all their groceries delivered and they'd sit around talking Who all day long.

 

But that just wasn’t practical.


	4. Friendly Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard and Kaidan go to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of character introductions here, plus we find out a little more about Shepard and Kaidan. I will be passing the torch back to Cereith for the next two chapters, and they shall be marvelous! We're still extremely excited about this fic so on we go! Enjoy! -Lucie
> 
> Excited is a drastic understatement. We really can't stop musing over this fic. Sometimes it gets way out of hand. This fic might be a long one, but we both seem to be in it for the long haul so we hope that you can stick with us as we tell this story. Ok enjoy the chapter that this amazing wonderful person wrote. Next will be me again so prepare for lots of angst!!!! -Cereith

**John**

 

The train ride to the office was a short one, just under twenty minutes, but it always gave him some time to get centered before he had to deal with the hustle and bustle of the news office.

 

He tried to keep his thoughts off Kaidan and the conversations they had that morning and the previous night, the way he sounded when he huffed out a laugh, the little smile behind his coffee mug, that tight shirt that hugged his body ridiculously well.

 

It was impossible.

 

His hands found themselves sketching the scene in his kitchen on the spare pad he always carried with him, graphite gliding over the paper with ease as he did his best to visualize every perfect curve of his new roommates body.

 

So yes, it was art appreciation not ogling, he told himself, and he mostly believed it. That was until his jeans started to feel a bit snug in the groin, his sketchpad doing wonders to hide his embarrassment.

 

That was when it was time to call a spade a spade. He ogled the hell out of that man, and he planned to do it again.

 

He really enjoyed riding the train, and not just because it gave him time to art. It made him feel closer to the people and that was his ultimate goal. He’d been a rich trust fund kid all his life, sent to the best school, socialized with the _right_ people.

 

But he also had a great guardian after he and Jane’s parents died who instilled in him the importance of hard work and philanthropy. Empathy. Neither he nor Jane ever needed to work a day in their life, but they both chose to.

 

And while Jane may’ve preferred a more carefree lifestyle, traveling the world to write her contribution to the Normandy News, John chose to be more hands on. It made sense considering it was his paper.

 

Of course, his senior staff were the only ones who knew he was the illusive John Spectre, billionaire and owner of the Normandy News. The truth was hidden behind a wall of technical, legal, and financial mumbo jumbo, but the gist was the paper was his, as were a few other things around the city.

 

What he loved most was the anonymity that the separate identity afforded him, the specter of John Spectre, the ability to blend in with the crowd, the chance to find love and friendship that came from people loving who he was as a person and not how much money he had in the bank.

 

He gave money away to charities like candy at Halloween, but he was careful of where it went: only to worthy, deserving causes. He also owned the building he lived in and rented several units out at very low rates to families in need.

 

He loved the building so much that he had bought the whole thing up sometime after Anderson gave him his loft, but not even Garrus knew that little detail.

 

Needless to say, taking the train was a choice. He could’ve owned a fleet of sports cars if he felt the need to or could’ve been chauffeured around in a limo by a driver, but the train was what he liked. Riding around with the backbone of the city, the working class, made him feel more connected to humanity.

 

At his core, John Shepard was a humanitarian, a man with a big heart and no one to give it to. Or so he had thought.

 

-_-

 

John rushed through the doors of his office building—which he owned as well—and headed for the stairs. He never took the elevators, preferring the little morning workout the ten flights gave him.

 

As soon as he pushed through the doors to the news floor, the peace and quiet he’d been blanketed in up to that point was replaced with controlled chaos. People were pounding away on keyboards, jabbering—and some yelling—into phones, and several simply running amok.

 

His personal assistant, Grunt, met him halfway across the floor. “Jane’s article is late,” he snarled, handing John a datapad with the current layout of their next magazine already displayed.

 

“Again? She gets to travel the world for a living and she can’t seem to turn in a five hundred word article twice a month?”

 

He sighed and shook his head. That was Jane. He was running the paper and she was out running from party to party. He supposed that’s what happened when you were four minutes older; he had to be the responsible one.

 

When they reached his office, Grunt put down his mug to flip through his own datapad. He and Shepard would go through emails first thing and handle any problems that hadn’t been taken care of the previous day.

 

“Did Joker get the those new comics done? He wanted me to do some final touches on them,” Shepard asked as he sat down in his chair.

 

His office was anything but extravagant, the most expensive thing being the embellished oak desk that had been his father’s, but there were a few model planes in a display case that he’d work on from time to time and several pieces of art—most of which were his own.

 

“You mean these?” Grunt asked, picking up several sketches that now had brown coffee rings on them.

 

“Grunt!!”

 

“Wasn’t me,” the big man shrugged.

 

“I just watched you sit your coffee down on them,” Shepard groaned, head rolling back towards the ceiling.

 

“Just make them sepia and no one will know.”

 

Shepard eyed the sketches for a moment. That actually wasn’t a bad idea, might even look better than in color. Sometimes Grunt was a genius in disguise.

 

Shepard had signed up for one of those big brother programs in college and was paired up with Grunt who had been in his teens. They’d connected instantly, except their relationship soon morphed from that of big brother/little brother into something more akin to father/son.

 

Second to his Junior Editor and best friend, Garrus, Grunt was Shepard’s most reliable and trusted confidante, even if he had trouble remembering coffee orders and was a little bit accident prone, which he often blamed on his enormous size.

 

“Alright, well if Jane doesn’t get her article in by noon, we’ll swap out her piece with the next issue of ‘Ask Kelly.’ She always has something ready to go just in case.”

 

“Sure thing,” Grunt said, taking a seat across from him and propping his feet up on the corner of Shepard’s desk. Shepard shot him a look that rolled right off him.

 

“Shepard, do you have a minute?” Steve asked from the doorway after a light knock.

 

“I always have time for you Steve,” Shepard said with a smile. He and Steve had tried their hand at dating a time or two, but after a few awkward dates and one night of mediocre sex, they decided they made better friends.

 

“Did you happen to catch the game last night?” he asked, moving into the room to stand beside Grunt.

 

He thought back to the previous night sitting next to Kaidan on the couch. It had been a little more awkward than he had expected, but he wasn’t into football as much as he was hockey. He just wasn’t sure what Kaidan would’ve liked and suggested the game that Steve and James had been going on and on about all day long.

 

“Yeah, I watched it.”

 

“It was a really great game so I took the liberty of writing up a piece about it. I know it’s a little late notice, but I was hoping to steal some room from Vega’s column to squeeze it in.”

 

“What?” James’ voice boomed off the walls.

 

The wall of muscle had been bringing Shepard his usual breakfast burrito and apparently heard the tail end of the conversation. He and Steve liked rival sports teams and Vega’s Makos had lost to the Hammerheads.

 

He wasn’t one to speculate, but Shepard knew their little rivalry had to lead to some killer makeup sex with the way they carried on. Unfortunately, he didn’t find it quite as satisfying.

 

Shepard pinched the bridge of his nose as James stormed in and tossed his breakfast at him. “I haven’t agreed to anything yet, Vega, but you just lost points for treating my burrito like a football,” he chided.

 

“Sorry, Loco, but I already got all my articles ready to go. Everything is in, and everyone knows health and wellbeing is so much more important than sports,” James pouted, crossing his thick arms across his chest.

 

“Are we having the meeting in here?” Jack hollered from the hallway.

 

“No, we’ll be in the conference room in five. Round everyone up,” Shepard ordered. He’d been there less than five minutes and already had a headache. And his morning only got worse when he bit into his cold burrito.

 

_-_

 

**Kaidan**

 

Kaidan left the apartment shortly after Shepard did. It was weird being alone in it for the first time. He hadn’t had time for it to sink in that he lived there. He felt more like a guest spending the night at a stranger’s house, a hot stranger, but a stranger nonetheless.

 

He was happy his commute wasn’t that long, only about ten minutes, it didn’t give him enough time to start overthinking things. Shepard seemed like a cool guy and he still couldn’t get over the fact that he was the editor of the Normandy News.

 

He was a little awestruck by that if he was being completely honest. His own job was extremely important and rewarding, but Shepard ran a whole newspaper, and that was important in its own way.

 

Kaidan loved his job and joined the fire academy right out of college. He hadn’t wanted to go but his father all but forced him. The senior Alenko had wanted him to run the family business out of their family orchard, and while he didn’t technically need a degree for that, his father insisted.

 

He had dreamed of being a firefighter for as long as he could remember, and he applied before he even graduated.

 

That’s where he met Ashley, in the academy. She was fresh out of high school and was following in her family’s footsteps. The irony that he was doing the opposite wasn’t lost on either of them, and they managed to strike up an easy friendship.

 

Her and Rahna had never gotten along, though. He always assumed it was Rahna being jealous of Ashley, but they were cordial enough not for it to cause any problems. He kind of wondered if Ash’s gut instinct about her had been right all along.

 

But he and Rahna were already engaged by that point.

 

They were highschool sweethearts and as soon as he had enough money saved up, he bought her a ring. Looking back, he wondered how much of that had also been due to pressure from his parents.

They loved Rahna and meshed well with her family. He knew…he thought—at one time—that she would’ve made a great wife and mother. They had been together for so long that it appeared to be the next logical step, but like his parents, she never approved of his decision to become a firefighter.

 

He was certain that was the root of the problem, but giving it up wasn’t something he was willing to do for her or anyone else. It was who he was, and when it finally came down to it, he would rather be a lonely firefighter than married and miserable.

 

The station came into view and he pulled in next to the Captain’s truck. Ashley was waiting for him inside and had snagged him his favorite pastry. “Morning Sunshine! How was your first night in the bachelor pad?” she snickered.

 

“You’ve seen it, Ash. It’s hardly a bachelor pad,” he replied, moving past her towards the coffee pot.

 

He poured him a refill on his coffee, which had him thinking briefly of Shepard and their conversation before breakfast. He smiled to himself as he tried to think of a way to convince the man to switch coffee brands.

 

“I’ll give you that. Shepard has great taste,” she smirked at him over the rim of her mug, raising a brow, “Maybe that translates to men too.”

 

She was probably right about that, so assuming Shepard was into men, he still had no chance with him. Anyone with good taste certainly wouldn’t waste their time with him. “Ashley, would you drop that nonsense? You’re seeing things.”

 

Like it was planned, Kaidan’s phone pinged with an incoming text.

 

**{Shepard} I don’t think you have my number so I wanted to make sure you did, for emergencies. Hope you have a good day. Stay safe.**

 

Kaidan grinned as he read the message. ‘Stay safe’ was a helluva lot more than he ever got from Rahna. Her sign off was usually ‘Stay home.’

 

**{Shepard} This is Shepard btw, your roommate, just in case you didn’t know. I’ll stop bothering you so you can get back to saving cats in trees. :)**

 

**{Kaidan} Thanks, but knowing our house, it’ll probably be a hamster.**

 

**{Shepard} Lol, I’ve always wanted a hamster. Okay, I’ll really stop bothering you now.**

 

He wanted to shout back that Shepard was in no way bothering him, but Ashley cleared her throat. When he looked up, she had the biggest shit-eating grin on her face he’d ever seen.

 

“It’s him, isn’t it?” she snickered, leaning her elbows on the counter as she pinned him with knowing eyes.

 

“Him who?” Miranda asked as her and Jacob walked in the kitchen to grab their morning coffee.

 

“Kaidan’s boy—”

 

“My new roommate,” Kaidan spoke over her, giving her a death glare before moving out of the way for the two newcomers.

 

“So you and Rahna are really over?” Jacob asked.

 

Most everyone in the house knew he was having marital problems. It was no secret that divorce rates among firefighters were extremely high, and it was hard to keep things like that quiet when people worked so closely with one another.

 

“I officially moved out…well, not officially. I still need to go back and get some more of my clothes and things, but I was hoping to wait until she went out of town to see her parents in a few weeks. I think I can last till then,” Kaidan explained as he started to fidget, rubbing the back of his neck.

 

“I’m really sorry to hear that Kaidan,” Miranda frowned. “If you need any help moving, just ask.”

 

“I appreciate that, Miranda.”

 

“You’ll never guess who his new roommate is,” Ashley nearly squealed with excitement.

 

“It’s really not a big deal,” Kaidan said. In an attempt to avoid the conversation, he headed for the meeting area. He wasn’t as lucky as he hoped. The three of them followed him down.

 

“It’s John Shepard. The newspaper editor for the Normandy News, and let me tell you Miranda, he is hot!”

 

“Shepard?”

 

“Yeah, have you heard of him? There was an ad in his paper and Kaidan called and got the apartment. Can you believe it? He’s living in Tiberius Towers!” Ashley continued as they moved into the meeting room.

 

Captain Wrex was talking to Mordin while he waited for everyone to arrive. They all gave a quick "Hey Captain," as they passed and got mostly grunts in return.

 

“Wow, that place is really amazing. Expensive too, from what I hear,” Jacob said, picking up where they left off.

 

“What happened to Garrus?” Miranda asked.

 

“He moved in with his girlfriend,” Kaidan said before the confusion hit him, “Wait! How do you know Garrus?”

 

“He’s best friend’s with Shepard, and I’ve known Shepard since high school,” she replied.

 

Kaidan couldn’t help the flicker of something that felt a lot like jealousy that bubbled up inside of him. He understood that it was irrational; he shouldn’t be feeling that way about someone he’d only really known a few days.

 

Not to mention the little annoying fact that he had no chance whatsoever with his probably very straight roommate. What made him believe he had chance to begin with? Kaidan Alenko was a mess no one in their right mind would want to deal with.

 

Shepard was free to date whomever he chose, and Miranda was beautiful and strong and good at everything she did. They would make an excellent couple.

 

Kaidan couldn’t compete with her or with that kind of history if he tried. Maybe he should start looking for another place to live because he just knew that any sort of feelings he developed for Shepard would end in heartbreak, and he’d already had enough of that to last a lifetime.

 

Unfortunately, he didn’t have the time or funds to look for someplace new. So he’d have to deal with whatever came from his dilemma. Not to mention he just moved yesterday.

 

“I can’t believe you know Shepard and you didn’t tell us!” Ashley said, shooting Miranda a fake glare. “I guess I can’t blame you for wanting to keep a hottie like him to yourself.”

 

“He’s always been a pretty private person,” Miranda explained as they all settled into their usual spots to wait for Wrex to start the meeting.

 

“So...anything ever happen there?” she pressed, and Kaidan wanted to run away because he didn’t want to know the answer to that. He also wanted to punch Ashley in the shoulder, but he knew that would only lead to her hitting him back even harder.

 

“Alright you gossips, pipe down! We got a lot to go over here, so let’s get started,” Wrex bellowed from the front of the room. Everyone went silent and gave him their full attention.

 

But before he could say another word, the alarm went off and the voice of their trusty dispatcher echoed off the walls.

 

“Engine 81, Truck 82, Ambulance 83. Fire at the Presidium Pet Store,” Traynor called out from the firehouses speaker system. “And don’t come back without saving all the animals.”

 

It looked like he might get to save a hamster after all. Shepard was going to have a laughing fit about it, and Kaidan had a bad feeling he was going to love hearing it.


	5. Saving Blasto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan has an interesting day at work; he brings John a gift; the roommates share morning coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Cereith's chapter, but I'm posting it! Enjoy the fluffy animals! -Lucie

**Kaidan**

 

The sirens flashed and sounded as they raced down the road to get to the fire scene.

 

The fire truck driver, Jacob Taylor, grew up on the streets of Citadel. So he was able to navigate the streets better than anyone.

 

Black smoke could be seen escaping a building as they neared the fire scene. There were a number of people and animals on the street at a safe distance away from the burning building.

 

They came to stop in the middle of the street in front of the pet store. Zaeed, Jacob, Miranda, and Kaidan all got out of the truck. Engine, which consisted of Ashley, Samara, Thane, and their new addition Jenkins, did the same. Chakwas and Mordin were aiding those that need medical attention.

 

Each squad was working on setting up their equipment when Captain Wrex came up to them after speaking with a store employee.

 

“Manager says they were able to get most of the animals out before the fire spread but thinks there might be a couple left on the second floor,” Captain Wrex’s voice held the tone of authority. ”Zaeed, get your team in there. See if you can find any of the animals while Engine sets up to put out the fire.”

 

The one-eyed man nodded at Wrex before turning around to his teammates. “Miranda, Kaidan, you take the second floor. Jacob and I will take the first. Find anyone, you get them out.”

 

They all nodded to their Lieutenant and got their SCBA to head into the burning building.

 

Putting on his face mask, Kaidan headed in the building with Miranda in tow. The fire was eating away at the objects on the store shelving. If he didn’t have his breathing apparatus on he would probably smell the burning stench of animal food and burning fabric.

 

“Kaidan, there’s a staircase on our left we can take to get upstairs.” Miranda’s voice could be heard through the helmets comms.

 

“Alright, let’s head up.” Kaidan and Miranda made their way to the staircase and headed up. The second floor of the building was no better than the first. Black smoke filled the room as the fire consumed empty animal cages and other appliances. “You check that side of the store. I’ll take the other. If you find any get them out.”

“Got it, I’ll comm you if I do.” 

 

Kaidan made his way down the store aisle as Miranda headed off to search the other side, both trying to find any source of life. He kept walking past empty glass containers that once held small animals that were now safely outside with the store employees. Aisle by aisle and row by row, he kept searching, but to no avail.

 

“I found something!” Miranda radioed. She had found one of the two animals still in the store. “It’s a cat, I’m bringing it out.”

 

“Go ahead,” Kaidan responded. “I’m still searching.”

 

“Don’t take too long,” she said before ending the connection.

 

Still not finding anything in his search, Kaidan was about to turn around and leave when he heard a faint thud and metal hitting against metal. He made his way to the source of the sound. Kaidan came across a glass tank with a light brown haired hamster running around the tank in a panic from the fire happening around it.

 

Kaidan remove the tank’s lid and moved to carefully grab the small animal in his gloved hands. “Come on, buddy. Let’s get you out.”

 

The hamster seemed to understand what Kaidan was saying so it scurried onto his hands. It scrunched up its nose in disgust at the smell of the smoke. Kaidan wrapped his hands around the small creature protectively and began to make his way out of the building.

 

“I’m coming out,” Kaidan commed once he was on his way down the stairs. “I have a small animal with me.”

 

Kaidan made his way out through the burning exit. Ashley nodded to him and he returned the sentiment. She and her team went into the building with a fire hose in hand.

 

Miranda was on the other side of the street holding a white furred ash covered cat as a store employee looked it over. Zaeed and Jacob here with Chakwas as she cared for an unconscious employee. He went over to Miranda and the store vet.

 

“Hey, I found this one on the second floor. It was still in its glass container.” Kaidan showed the hamster to them. It started sniffing the air around it as the vet looked it over.

 

“Thank goodness you found him,” the vet said once she was done inspecting the hamster. “He’s a new one that was just up for adoption.”

 

“So was this one,” Miranda said as she lightly pet the white furred cat.

 

“What’s going to happen to the animals?” Kaidan asked.

 

“I’m not sure. With the store in ruins we can’t keep them here until we rebuild, but that would take a long time.” The vet pondered at the animal’s predicament, trying to figure out what to do with the now homeless animals.

 

“We could take some of them off your hands,” Kaidan said as he looked down at the light brown haired creature still in his palm looking up at him.

 

“Would you?” The vet looked hopeful at Kaidan and Miranda.

 

“Sure,” Miranda smiled, “The Captain won't mind.”

 

Kaidan tried to hold back a laugh at that. Wrex would probably be annoyed at first, but the man was like a large teddy bear. He would warm up to the animals.

 

Kaidan watched the hamster stare up at him, “Hear that bud, you’re coming home with me.”

 

The hamster squeaked happily as if to say ‘home’.

 

Soon enough Ashley and her crew were able to put out the fire. Chakwas and mordin were taking burn victims to the hospital for treatment, most of them were just minor burns that the two EMT’s just wanted to make sure would get treated properly.

 

When they made it back to the firehouse almost every crew member brought back an animal with them much to their Captain’s disapproval.

 

“I don't want those animals stinking up the place, got it?” Wrex’s voice echoed in the half empty firehouse.

 

“Yeah, we got it Wrex.” Ashley called out as a white haired puppy ran up to the man in question.

 

Wrex growled at the small animal when all it did was stare up at him panting with its tongue sticking out. The dog, thinking he was playing with him, barked back making Wrex only growl again in return.

 

“Well isn't that adorable,” Miranda cooed, “They're playing.”

 

Ashley and Kaidan lightly laughed at their growly Captain. They both knew that if the Captain really didn't like the small pup he would just ignore it, but instead he kept playing with it.

 

The hamster Kaidan brought back with him was now safely in a small carrying cage. The small animal ran around the cage sniffing the air around him to get familiar with its surroundings. It came to stop and stared up at Kaidan.

 

“Aww, he’s cute.” Ashley looked over his shoulder at the small animal. “What are you going to name him?”

 

“Not sure. I was going to give him to Shep-” Kaidan immediately thought about what his roommate would think of him bringing this small creature into his home. How could he be so inconsiderate of his generous roommate? Would he be mad at him? Would he need to move out? God, damn it! How could he fuck up so bad by not considering Shepard?

 

What gave him even a semblance of hope was the short text conversation they had earlier that morning. Kaidan hoped his roommate would like the hamster.

 

“I was going to let Shepard name him, since this is for him.” Kaidan finished once he came out of his self-deprecating thoughts.

 

“That’s nice of you,” she said with a twinkle in her eye. “I think he'll like it.”

 

“I hope so,” Kaidan really did hope his roommate would like the small hamster.

 

Wrex was now petting the snowball colored pup. The hulking man had warmed up to the pup rather quickly.

 

“This one stays at the house.” Wrex boomed. The entire house only lightly smiled and shook their heads at the Captain. Everyone already knew that their captain would decide to keep the pup at the house.

 

“We already got the puppy a collar with the firehouse number on it,” Miranda said confirming what everyone already knew.

 

Kaidan briefly wondered if he should send a quick text to Shepard and let him know he was bringing the hamster back with him but thought otherwise just in case Shepard didn't want him bringing the hamster back with him.

 

For the rest of his shift he thought of what to say to Shepard once he went back to the apartment; the hamster ran around its wheel and ate his food pellets.

 

_-_

 

**John**

 

To say he was tired would be an understatement. The day was filled with endless meetings from his staff and department heads. They were interrupted by the information that a pet store had been on fire. When they caught wind of the burning pet store they started to get to work on covering the story.

 

After dealing with that, he had to try and get a hold of his sister, Jane, who still hadn’t submitted her piece. Really, that was a hardship in and of itself. When he did get a hold of her she said that she would be coming back to Citadel in about a week. He made a mental note to inform Kaidan about his sister coming over.

 

He got his keys out his pants pocket and unlocked his apartment door. He’d been anxious all day to get home and speak with Kaidan more, but instead he arrived to an empty apartment. Right, Kaidan had told him that he wouldn’t be back until tomorrow morning.

 

Setting down the takeout order on the kitchen island he got from Apollo’s Café on his way home, he went to the cupboards and took out a plate to serve his food on. He ate in silence as the kitchen TV screen acted as background noise.

 

After he ate his meal and stored the leftovers in the fridge, he briefly wondered if he should text Kaidan to see how he was doing or if he needed anything once he got back in the morning, but he thought against it thinking he would just be bothering his roommate.

 

Releasing a tired sigh, Shepard rubbed the back of his buzzcut head and went upstairs to get ready for bed. After getting showered and brushing his teeth he turned in for the night.

 

Before sleep took him, Shepard thought about what his roommate was doing at that moment. Would he be sleeping? Was he handling some firefighter emergency or whatever it is they did when there wasn’t a fire to put out? Was he lying in bed thinking of him?

 

Sighing, he finally let sleep take him.

 

_-_

 

His alarm sounded throughout the room, gently coaxing him out of his restful sleep. Turning off the alarm, he got up and got ready for the day ahead. He brushed his teeth, took a quick shower, and got dressed in his grey v-neck shirt and light blue jeans.

 

He was preparing the coffee machine to make his morning cup of Mindoir Mountain Roast coffee when he heard the doorknob rattle indicating that someone was entering the apartment. A smile spread across his face because he knew it was Kaidan arriving home from his twenty-four hour shift.

 

Once he heard the door shut, without turning around, he called out to Kaidan. “Hey, Kaidan. I’m in the kitchen.”

 

“Hey, give me a sec,” Kaidan said. Shepard could hear a hint of nervousness in his roommate's voice. “Shepard, I uh, brought you something.”

 

Shepard’s heart fluttered slightly at the thought of Kaidan bringing him something, “Really, what is it?”

 

“Uh, well...” Kaidan came into the kitchen carrying a small cage and his duffel bag slung over his shoulder. “Here.”

 

Shepard walked over to Kaidan as he gently set the cage down on the kitchen countertop. He peered down to look inside the cage, and what he saw was a light brown ball of fur in the middle of it. A moment later a head poked out of the ball of fur that was actually the body of a hamster. The small hamster sniffed the air to familiarize itself with its new surroundings. It stood on its back paws and peered up at Shepard staring at him through half lidded eyes as it tried to scent him.

 

The hamster squeaked as if to say ‘Hi.’

 

“Aww, its cute,” Shepard said looking up at Kaidan from his leaned down position. “What’s its name?”

 

“Uh, he doesn’t have a name,” Kaidan shuffled nervously where he stood, “I was going to let you name him. He is yours after all.”

 

Shepard was deeply moved by the gesture.

 

“Thanks, Kaidan.” Kaidan appeared to have lost some of the nervousness he had when he arrived home. Shepard opened up the lid of the carrying cage and let the small animal crawl onto his hand, “Alright, what would be a good name for you.”

 

Shepard hummed as he thought of names to give the small animal. He let the small creature sniff his palms as he held him. Finally Shepard came to a decision for a name, “What about Blasto!”

 

His enthusiasm for the name wasn’t lost on the small creature as it squeaked his approval for the name.

 

“Ok, Blasto then,” Shepard said putting the hamster back in its cage.

 

“Blasto is a good name,” Kaidan said without the hint a nervousness Shepard found there before.

 

“Thanks. So how did you come across a hamster?” Shepard asked. He went back over to the coffee machine as it finished dispensing the dark brown liquid into the pot.

 

“There was a fire at a pet store so my house was called in to the scene.”

 

“I heard about that,” Shepard took out a couple of mugs and set them on the island top. “Wait- so you actually saved a hamster!”

 

Kaidan nodded.

 

Shepard released a belly filled laugh, momentarily forgetting about serving his coffee. Kaidan lightly chuckled as he walked up to take a seat on one of the stools next to the kitchen island.

 

Shepard was able to catch the tail end of his roommates light laughter once he composed himself enough. He wished he could hear the man laugh more often.

 

“Oh my god,” he said a bit winded from his laughter. “I thought you were kidding when you texted back joking your house would save a hamster.”

 

“I was, I didn't think a pet store would catch on fire to prove me right.”

 

Shepard grabbed one of the mugs and filled it with the dark amber liquid. He grabbed the other mug and gestured to Kaidan if he wanted some too. Kaidan nodded and he filled the mug with coffee.

 

“How was work yesterday?” Kaidan asked once Shepard got out the milk and sugar dispenser so they could prepare their coffee.

 

“It was exhausting.” Shepard poured two spoons of sugar and a bit of milk into his coffee to give it that light brown color. “Oh by the way, my sister called and said she’d be coming over in about a week.”

 

“You have a sister?” Kaidan was preparing his coffee before he looked up at Shepard. “What’s her name?”

 

“Her name is Jane.” Shepard took a small sip of his still scorching hot coffee. He didn't want to burn his tongue; he just wanted to get that delicious taste of the brew. “She does a travel column for the paper. Mostly it's just her commenting on how the area looks and the local hot spots that wouldn't be known to most tourists.”

 

“She sounds like she’s having a fun time. I can't wait to meet her.” Kaidan lightly blew into his still hot coffee mug to cool it down.

 

“You’d like her. She can be a handful, but she’s a lot like me in some ways.” Shepard took another sip, though this time the coffee wasn't as hot.

 

“I think I like her already if she’s anything like you are,” Kaidan said shyly.

 

Shepard would have almost choked on his coffee at what Kaidan just said. Did he just say he liked him? Was he being hit on by his gorgeously handsome hot roommate? Oh god! He was, wasn’t he?

 

_Ok, just play it cool, you’ve done this before. Just say something back. Like maybe how good his biceps look. What? No! The hell is wrong with you. Say something damn it!_

 

Maybe Kaidan was just being nice? Right? No way someone as hot as Kaidan would be into him, he was way out of the firefighter’s league.

 

Kaidan probably would like his sister though. Everyone loved Jane. Kaidan wouldn't be any different. The man would probably propose to her within a year and he’d have to stand at the chapel wishing them a happy life together. While he stood there with a gaping hole in his heart and a knife wrenched in his gut.

 

God damnit! He was so painstakingly far gone for his roommate.

 

“This is good.” Kaidan brought Shepard out of his self-doubting thoughts. “What is it? It’s not Gargarin Ground is it?”

 

“Nope, this is my brew. Mindoir Mountain Roast.” Shepard smirked at his roommate. Silently celebrating that he was able to get Kaidan to drink his brew instead.

 

“This stuff is actually pretty good.” Kaidan sent a small smile towards Shepard that sent a warmth straight to his groin. Kaidan took a generous sip of the coffee and let go of a small moan that made Shepard’s cock painfully bulge against his pants zipper.

 

Shepard coughed and fidgeted in his seat trying to get rid of his still growing erection. He considered palming himself, but quickly thought against it because that would only make matters worse.

 

“Ah so what do we do with Blasto?” Shepard asked, still attempting to get rid of his erection.

 

“Well, he's yours now. I kind of wanted to get him a bigger cage; that one's too small for him. Oh that reminds me.” Kaidan got up from the stool and went over to his duffel bag that he placed on the floor near Blasto’s cage. He took out a plastic paper bag and handed it to Shepard once he sat back down again. “It’s a bag of food and some treats, the vet from the shop told me these were the kinds he liked.”

 

“Thanks.” Shepard looked into the bag and made a mental note to figure out where to buy more pet supplies. For him though, it shouldn't pose a problem. “I’ll buy a cage for him online and have it shipped for tomorrow so he won't be cramped up in that small cage any longer than he has to.”

 

Shepard looked over at the now sleeping creature in its balled up position. His phone rang startling them both as the room was in a comfortable silence.

 

“Hey, Garrus,” Shepard said once he picked up the phone and saw who was calling.

 

“Shepard, where the hell are you. You’re an hour late.” Garrus concerned filled voice came out of the receiver.

 

“I am?” Shepard look at the clock on his phone confirming that he was late for work. “Shit, I’ll be there in twenty.”

 

“Alright, I’ll let the others know.” Garrus’ voice could he heard calling out the information before the line disconnected.

 

“I’m late for work.” Shepard got up from his seat and went to grab his To-Go mug and filled it with coffee.

 

“Did I keep you too long?” Kaidan’s voice once again held that tinge of nervousness again. Shepard hated it for some reason though he didn't yet know why. “God, I’m sorry Shepard.”

 

“Hey, it's alright.” Shepard smile at the firefighter which seemed to calm him down some. He didn't want to leave without making sure Kaidan knew he meant it. Shepard walked up to Kaidan and wrapped his arms around the man. He could feel Kaidan slowly lose the tension in his body as he hugged him. Shepard relished in the warmth from his roommate. He didn't want to let go for fear that he would never get to feel this sensation again. Leaning back slightly Shepard said, “It’s fine see, and thanks for the hamster. I can't wait to buy him things.”

 

Shepard released his roommate, missing the warm body next to him. Kaidan sent a relieved smile, all the tension gone from his body. “Ok, have a good day at work.”

 

“Thanks, I’ll see you when I get back?” 

 

Kaidan nodded.

 

Shepard made to grab his To-Go mug and his work bag. “Ok bye.” He waved at Kaidan and at Blasto poking his head out slightly looking at him before walking out the door.


	6. Blasto Gets a New Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard and Kaidan going shopping with Blasto!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!  
> Here's the next chapter to the fic. We hope you like it as much as we did.  
> Note that for this month the chapter will be slow to come out as we are both swamped with work, but things should settle near the end of the month.  
> Thank you for your patience!  
> -Cereith

**John**

Work was always hectic with all the chaos and meetings of any average news office. However, this time it seemed to be worse because the whole time Shepard had been thinking about that cute brown fur ball that was now his ‘child,’ Blasto. Throughout the day he’d been online searching for things to buy Blasto. Who knew there were so many types of bedding and foods for hamsters. He figured that buying a cage online wouldn’t be practical because he didn’t know if the size of the cage would be enough for the little guy. There were also foods to think about since he didn’t know what would be healthy for a hamster’s dietary needs. So he decided he would go to an actual pet store that had an in-house vet that would know what was safe and healthy for his new hamster.

Standing in front of his apartment door, Shepard wondered what it would be like to arrive home in a perfect world...

Getting home, Kaidan pushes Shepard up against the door. Callused hands roaming his body elicit small whiny moans from him, making his body wither in the enclosed space between Kaidan and the door. Shepard loves the way his body twitches and shivers at the touch of those deft hands working him over. Kaidan mouths at his neck, working at the now overly sensitive skin to turn it into an angry beat red. Evidence of his claim over him…

He was brought out of his fantasy when his keys hit the floor. Bending down to pick them up he noticed his almost fully erect dick as it got friction from his pants. It made him hiss in embarrassment.

Only in a perfect world would he get at least a taste of the firefighter’s lips. However, this wasn’t a perfect world, this was reality.

After collecting himself and waiting for his half hard erection to go away, he entered the apartment and dropped his work bag on the nearby side table.

“Hey Shepard.” He turned to look at Kaidan sitting on the couch who had turned so he could also face Shepard. “How was work?”

In a perfect world he’d be shoved up against the door, but in the real one he was welcomed back home by his straight roommate that probably wouldn’t give him the time of day. Even so, it was better than coming home to an empty apartment.

“It was rough, but I managed.” A warm smile bloomed across his face and he suddenly had the courage to ask the question he’d been thinking about since he left work. “I was about to take Blasto and head to the pet store to buy him some stuff. Would you like to come with me?”

His plan was to go home and pick up Blasto to take to him the pet store, and if he was lucky enough maybe he could convince his roommate to consider going with them because that was all he had to hope for. The consideration of hanging out with Shepard, not the full hope that Kaidan would because he'd just be setting himself up for disappointment.

“Yeah, I’d like to.” Well that was unexpected. He thought Kaidan would say ‘no’ or ‘I’m busy.’ Shepard wasn’t picky though, he’d take whatever time he could have with the firefighter.

“Really? Great.” Shepard’s energy and excitement grew at the prospect of having his roommate accompany him. “If we leave now we can catch the train to- “

“You want me to drive us there?” Kaidan asked getting up from the couch. Shepard’s heart warmed at the offering.

“If it’s alright with you. I’ll give you gas money if you want it.” It’s only fair to offer up gas money since Kaidan was so generously offering to drive him and Blasto down to a pet store.

“It’s fine, don’t worry about the gas,” Kaidan waved him off. “Let me go grab a jacket and we can head out. Blasto is on the coffee table.”

Kaidan quickly went upstairs to grab his jacket. The weather had been steadily dropping meaning winter was close at hand. Blasto’s carrying cage was sitting in the middle of the coffee table. The little fur ball was curled in on himself before Shepard knelt down to look closer.

The small animal quickly got on his hind paws and sniffed at the air to catch Shepard’s scent. The little guy squeaked in greeting.

“We’re going to get you a new home today, bud,” Shepard told the small animal. The little guy ran in a circle showing his apparent approval.

“Ok ready to go?” Kaidan asked once he was back down stairs wearing a waist long casual black cotton jacket over his light blue V-neck t-shirt and his light faded jeans. God, this man looked sexy in anything, didn’t he?

“Yeah, let’s go.” Shepard grabbed the carrying cage from the coffee table and followed Kaidan out the door.

Careful not to shake Blasto too much, they walked down the stairs to the main entrance and stepped onto the street where they proceeded to Kaidan’s parked car.

“Why are you parked on the street?” he asked. “You know the building has a parking level you could use.”

“I know, but I just haven’t got around to putting in the application for a pass,” Kaidan said as he unlocked the car doors for them to enter. “And it’s supposed to take up to a week or two to get one.”

“I could get the pass for you by tomorrow.” Shepard now faced Kaidan as they both sat in the car. Blasto was on Shepard’s lap biting at a small wood block.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I want to. Just fill out the application today and I can have the pass ready for you tomorrow.”

“I-Thanks Shepard.” Kaidan sent him a warm smile that did things to him. His pulse quicked. His heart hammered against his chest so hard he feared it could be heard. The smile felt private, intimate. Like a glimpse of what it would be like to know Kiadan on a more intimate level. A cruel tease, because he knew, hell the world knew, they would never be more than friends.

“The least I can do for you,” he said as calmly as he could.

Kaidan ignited the engine and drove off to the pet store. On the way there, they stayed in a comfortable silence. Much unlike the first night they spent together. Every now and then Shepard would give Kaidan directions to the pet store from his phone. Blasto was by the bars of the side of the cage looking out the window at the moving buildings as they drove down the streets of Citadel. With one final turn, Kaidan parked his car inside the mall parking lot where the pet store was housed.

“I didn’t know there was a mall on this side of the city,” Kaidan said once they were both out of the car and walking towards the elevator.

“Have you ever been to this side of town before?” Shepard asked as he pressed the button for the pet store floor.

“Not really. I mean I was dragged out here once by-” Kaidan stopped himself mid sentence. Shepard looked over as a deep frown formed on Kaidan’s face. That look worried Shepard. Kaidan looked hurt, in anguish at what was on his mind. “By someone I know.” Kaidan gritted out.

“I guess I’ll have to show you around like I said I would,” Shepard said. He ignored the look on Kaidan’s face thinking that the firefighter would tell him if it was important. That seemed to relieve Kaidan slightly as he perked up a bit and stared at Shepard.

“I’d really like that Shepard,” Kaidan expression changed from anguish to a more happy look. Shepard was proud that he could do that to his roommate by just the few words that he said. “Maybe you could show me where you work.” The hope in the man’s voice wasn’t lost on him. Shepard knew he was a fan of his magazine.

“Yeah we could do that. The Normandy News office isn’t too far from here by car,” he said happily. The elevator pinged signaling that they made it to their floor. Shepard and Kaidan walked out of the elevator then towards the shopping carts. Shepard grabbed a cart and tried to put Blasto in the kiddie seat, but the cage was too big to fit properly. He looked at the cart like it personally offended him then heard a small chuckle come from his roommate.

“Here let me carry him, you can push the cart.” Kaidan made grabby motions at Blasto’s cage.

“Thanks.” Shepard handed him Blasto then they both walked into the store, side by side.

The store contained aisles and aisles of pet products. Every shelf contained numerous amounts of pet toys, food brands, pet treats, and more for various animals. Shepard steered the cart towards what he assumed would be the small animals section of the store. He wanted to figure out what kind of home he would like to get his little guy so he moved towards the hamster habitat aisle. There were different sized cages that he could get. The websites he read told him that a hamster needed to have plenty of space for them to roam in so he opted to buy a fairly large sized cage.

The habitat that caught his eye had about three levels, each with its own purpose. The lower level would hold Blasto’s toys and treats, the middle level would contain his food and water, and the last level would be his sleeping area. The sleeping area looked like it had a hatch that could open as well as one on the lower and middle levels of the cage. The habitat was a bit too big to fit in the cart so Shepard made a note on his phone of the items name and number to give to the cashier once they checked out.

That was the easy part. Now came the more nerve wrecking one.

Shepard turned to look over at Kaidan. The firefighter was in front of glass tanks that held all forms of hamsters in each of them, even ones like Blasto. Kaidan held the carrying cage up so that Blasto could see the other hamsters. There were two dwarf hamsters sitting side by side staring out at Blasto. They looked like mini twin versions of him.

The three sniffed the air in between squeaks as if they were having a conversation. Shepard wondered what the little creatures were saying to one another. Only the voices weren’t coming from his imagination, but from his hot roommate’s own sultry voice.

“That your papa?” The mini Blasto on the left squeaked.

“Yep. Do you have a papa?” Blasto peeped.

“We have food and treats!” The mini Blasto on the right chimed in.

“Yeah, yeah! Food and treats, food and treats!” One of the mini Blastos started to run in circles in the tank, his brother joining him in the chanting and running.

An excited Blasto ran along with them in his own carrying cage as Kaidan looked on at the three hamsters. He was clearly amused at their interaction.

Shepard melted right then and there on the spot at the sound of his roommate making adorable hamster voices that fit so nicely with what the little ones were doing. Kaidan interacted with the small animals like he would a child.

That made Shepard wonder how he would be like around kids, more specifically their kids. Would he be the type of father that would teach them everything he knew or would he be the type of father that would be overprotective of everything? Shepard could see Kaidan throwing a football with their son or chasing off their daughter’s ex-boyfriends...

And why was he thinking about Kaidan and him having kids!? What the hell made him think things would progress that far? Shepard berated himself for thinking so stupidly and idiotically. It was more likely that Kaidan and Jane would be having kids together since Kaidan was obviously straight.

He just knew that when Jane flew in next week that she would take one look at the man and fall in love. Kaidan would probably fall in love right back and he’d end up as the Groomsmen at their wedding because Kaidan wouldn't want him as his best man. He’d be watching from the sidelines while they got their happily ever after while he was destined to live the rest of his days alone and miserable.

God damnit! What the hell made him think this would work out? What made him believe he could-

“Shepard,” Kaidan soft spoken voice brought Shepard out of his self loathing thoughts, “Are you ok?”

He took a cleansing breath then offered Kaidan a reassuring smile. “Yeah, I’m ok.”

Shepard walked over to Kaidan with the cart. “I’m going down the aisle to look for food. I already picked out his cage. Do you mind looking for treats and toys to buy?”

“Ok anything you want me to look for specifically?” Kaidan asked.

”Pick whatever you think he’ll like.”

Kaidan gave him a nod and Shepard proceeded down the aisle to look over the various food brands the store had for hamsters. Only he didn't know that there would be so many to pick from. All the different brands offered different types of diets for hamsters. He eyed two brands that offered the same type of diet only the price was different. So he wondered what made the more expensive one better than the cheaper one. Then there were two others that offered completely different diets, except these two were priced at the same value. Then there were others that were organic, non organic, gmo, non gmo, pellet food, or variety foods. Each brand with its own label of nutritional value.

Shepard was about to pull his hair out, if he had had any, just looking at the shelves of food brands. He was going crazy trying to pick out a food diet for his little guy. If he couldn't pick out food for his hamster what made him think he could care for him the way he should be cared for?

“Excuse me?” A feminine voice brought him out of his stupor. “Can I help you?”

Shepard looked down at the woman employee’s name tag. Dr. J Archer In Store Vet. Shepard let out a sigh of relief.

“Yes, uh can you help me pick out a food diet for my hamster?”

“Your hamster wouldn't happen to be the one with the guy down the aisle would it?” She looked down the aisle. Shepard followed her gaze to see Kaidan looking over the different toys they had for hamsters.

“Yeah, that’s my roommate. He came to help me shop.”

“First pet, huh?” She smirked at him knowingly.

“Sort of.” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I have a few fish at work, but those aren't too difficult to take care of.”

“Fish are a bit different than a hamstr. Ok well let’s see what I can find for you.”

Shepard waited patiently until the vet pulled out a food brand she felt would be best for his hamster.

“This food diet is what i would recommend. It's not genetically modified, its organic so you know that the ingredients are healthy. It has variety so food time would be fun instead of those mashed pellet foods, and it's cheap so the buyer saves some cash.” Shepard nodded along to what she was saying since she pretty much answered all his questions. “And your hamster will have a nice balanced diet.”

“As for bedding,” she said looking over at the bedding across the aisle, “Don't get the soft kind, it could be dangerous for a hamster. Instead buy the paper kind, and if it's white, it'll be easier to see where your hamster has done its business.”

“What about treats?” he asked.

“The ones we have in stock are good for your hamster. Any of them would be great, I suggest the strawberry ones. I find that they tend to like those the best.”

”Thanks doc, you've been a big help. I don't think I would’ve been able to find the right food diet for my guy.”

“Not a problem. Do you want help with anything else?”

“No, I'm fine, but thank you.”

“In that case,” she dug into her white coat and produced a white card, “Here’s my contact card if you want any information on care tips or anything else.”

Shepard pocketed the card making a mental note to put the information into his phone so he wouldn't lose it. “Thanks again. I'll be sure to call if I need help.”

“Looks like your boyfriend is waiting for you,” she said nodding towards Kaidan who was watching him. “Well, have a nice day.”

“You too.” Boyfriend? She thought Kaidan was his boyfriend? If only that were true. What would make her think he was dating Kaidan? Do they seem like a good pair to her or something?

God damnit!

He pushed the thoughts away because there was no point in dwelling on them, no matter how much he wished he was seeing Kaidan.

He walked over to his roommate once he picked out the bedding the doctor had recommended.

“Hey I think we picked out a few toys he likes,” Kaidan said motioning towards the small animal toys.

“Which ones?”

Kaidan grabbed a few of the hanging block toys that Blasto could chew on, wood blocks, a tunnel system, a saucer wheel for him to run on, and a woodblock housing for him to sleep inside of. Kaidan also put a water bottle and a food bowl into the cart. “Let's not forget the strawberry treats,” Shepard said.

Once they had everything they needed they headed towards the cashier. Shepard gave the clerk the name and number of the cage he wanted. He also asked the clerk if he could set up a repeat delivery system for the food and bedding so that he wouldn't have to worry about coming back to pick up new ones if he ran out.

They left the store and loaded up everything in the back seat of Kaidan’s car and trunk then started to drive home.

 

**_-_**

 

**Kaidan**

The drive home was relaxed, peaceful even. They conversed lightly about what they would eat for dinner. Trying to figure out where they would eat or rather where they would be allowed to eat with a hamster with them. They both refused to leave Blasto in the car by himself and Shepard seemed to be in a hurry to get home to put together that cage for Blasto.

“Maybe I could make us something?” He offered gently. Kaidan was far from a great cook, but he still considered himself decent enough to make meals for himself. He could make a meal for two, he did try to make meals for him and Rahna, but she ended up kicking him out of the kitchen and taking over before he could even get started.

At first, he thought it was endearing, her wanting to do something nice for him, but he soon realized it was just because she had to control everything. If it wasn't done her way, it wasn't done right, so he stopped trying.

“You can cook?” Shepard asked amazed.

“Yeah I can make a pretty good meal for one. I figured it couldn’t be that hard for two.” He smiled sheepishly at Shepard.

“Alright then let's stop at the grocery store just down the street. You might have to go in alone though. I don't think they'd let Blasto in.” Shepard peered down at the curled up furball in the middle of the cage. How Blasto could sleep through a bumpy road and not wake up was beyond Kaidan.

“Sure, are you fine with steak, vegetables, and beer?” Kaidan asked.

“Sounds good to me.”

Kaidan could only hope as much.

He drove a little ways down the street and parked in the grocery store parking lot. He lowered the windows of the car so Shepard could get some fresh air while he was gone then stepped into the store to buy what he would need.

He grabbed a basket then headed in the direction of the meat aisle. He didn’t know how much Shepard would want and there wasn't any frozen meat in the fridge so he opted to buy the steaks along with pork chops, chicken, bacon, and whatever else he thought they would need. After that it was just a simple matter of getting the right vegetables and seasonings he needed to make a good steak.

He also threw in a case of their favorite beer, really they had the same favorite beer that was so awesome, and a bottle of organic orange juice, he could make some nice mojitos with that. He may, or may not, have snuck a peek at Shepard’s liquor cabinet. What, the case was see-through, sue him!

He took all his items to the cashier then carried them all out to the car in both hands. Shepard got out of the car and placed Blasto on his empty seat.

“Did you buy out the whole store or something?” Shepard asked chuckling. He opened the back car door so Kaidan could place the groceries in the car. Kaidan nodded his thanks.

“I just noticed we didn't have any frozen meats in the fridge so i thought I’d buy us some and other stuff.” He placed the bag with the case of beer on the car floor so the bottles wouldn’t break along with the bottle of juice while the rest went on the seats.

“I’ve been meaning to buy frozen meats, so thanks. I can pay you back-”

“Nah that’s fine, consider getting me that parking pass thanks enough.” He smiled at him.

“Deal.” Shepard smiled back.

Both, and Blasto, were back on the road then soon carrying bags of groceries and hamster supplies -while Blasto eagerly cheered for them- in both hands and arms up the flights of stairs, minus the cage because there was no way they’d get that up there with all the other stuff. They would just have to make a second trip. Once they had all their stuff in their apartment they let out a sigh of relief.

Kaidan hastily put away the frozen meats in the freezer then put away all the other items in the appropriate places. He looked towards the living room and saw Shepard knelt down on the floor with what looked like pieces of the hamster cage he bought. Shepard was looking down at the instructions in frustration.

Kaidan grabbed one of cold bottle of beers they had then walked over to Shepard who was still eyeing the instructions skeptically.

“How do you put together a cage inside-out?” Shepard smacked the paper with his hand for emphasis.

“You’ll figure it out. Just follow the instructions step by step,” he said as he handed him the beer.

“Thanks.” Shepard took a quick swig of his beer then place it next to his phone on the coffee table beside him.

“Food should be ready by the time you’re done,” Kaidan called back over his shoulder.

With an audible grunt from Shepard, Kaidan got out the cooking pans, bowls, and utensils he’d need. The steaks weren’t frozen solid so he didn’t have to leave it out overnight to defrost or flash fry it either. He did have to wash it under warm water because, ew a lot of people manhandled these plastic meat packages. After which, he had buttered up the pan, took out the cutting board and cutting knife, and got down to work.

Kaidan could do this cooking process in his sleep. That’s how many times he’d done it for himself. For some odd reason he was excited to be cooking for someone else other than just himself. He was interested to see what Shepard would think of his cooking. The man probably ate gourmet meals all day, he was the editor of a fairly popular newspaper after all. So maybe his cooking wouldn’t compare to all the other amazing food Shepard had probably eaten throughout his career. But hell if he wasn’t going to try to get at least one person to enjoy his cooking. Rahna never did even though she didn't outright say it.

While he cooked, he couldn’t help but sneak peaks in Shepard’s direction, to check on his progress, but also because he looked sexy with one eye raised in concentration. At one point, he looked up and Shepard was nearly halfway done assembling the cage. Speaking of cages where was Blasto’s carrying-

Looking over at the coffee table, Kiadan could see the furball that was Blasto standing on his hind paws with his tiny head tilted slightly to the side as he eyed Shepard curiously. How Blasto got out his cage, he didn't know, but it didn't look like Blasto was the type of hamster that would make a run for it once they managed to get out their cage.

Apparently Shepard had already noticed he was out because he heard a “What are you looking at?” come from Shepard. To which Blasto only squeaked.

He chuckled to himself as Shepard’s phone buzzed beside his beer bottle. It slightly startled Blasto making him run away from the vibrating device to hide behind the TV remote. He poked his head out over the remote looking at the device annoyingly.

Unfazed, Shepard picked up the phone and answered. Kaidan didn’t pay attention to his conversation as he was halfway done cooking the steaks so he was startled a bit when Shepard walked up to him a few minutes later asking him something.

“Huh?” Shepard was covering the phone’s mic with his hand. “Sorry Separd, I didn’t catch that.”

“Do you mind if a couple of my co-workers come over for dinner? They want to get some work done and they haven’t eaten yet.” Shepard fidgeted slightly.

“Yeah sure, I don’t mind.” Kaidan walked over to the fridge to take out a couple more steaks to prepare. “How do they like their staek?”

“Make one well done for Garrus and another medium rare for Steve.” Shepard said grinning from ear to ear.

“Got it.”

“Thanks.” Shepard put the phone back to his ear. “Hey, yeah Steve? You and Garrus can come over, but bring more beer.” He paused for the person on the other end to reply. Shepard chuckled at the callers response. “Yeah you know my favorite brand.” Shepard looked over at Kaidan smiling. “Ok see you in a bit.”

“So they’re your co-worker huh?” Kaidan asked before Shepard could leave and because he was interested to know who worked with Shepard.

“Uh yeah, but they’re more like really close friends than co-workers.” Shepard rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“That’s nice. I bet it's sort of hard to get work done though.” Kaidan somehow managed to cook the steaks already on the pan, prepare the next couple of steaks for their guests, and simultaneously talk with Shepard. The whole thing seemed so…domestic.

“Yeah, we’re lucky enough that we don’t have all those disgusting office politics like all the other newspapers do. We’re a really tight-nit group.”

“Wow you guys are lucky then. How’d that happen?”

“Well we sort of started the whole newspaper together. Garrus is sort of my co-editor and Steve, the guy I was talking to on the phone, is my head of the sports column of the paper.”

“That sounds awesome Shepard. Must be nice then. Tell me about them.”

“That could take hours,” The man laughed holding onto the kitchen island for balance. “But I’ll at least tell you about Garrus and Steve since they’re coming over.”

“Fair enough.” Now he had the next couple of steaks prepared and the already cooking steaks were nearly ready, so he could give Shepard some more of his slightly divided attention.

“Garrus is my closest friend. We met our first year in college and have been inseparable ever since. Always cracking jokes or helping each other out through bad breakups. Steve is a great guy. When we first met he was kinda closed off around me. I didn't know why at the time, but then I found out he…”

Shepard stopped abruptly causing Kaidan to look up at him.

“He?” Shepard seemed to be contemplating him as if looking for something. Whatever it was he seemed to find it.

“I found out he liked me and we went out.” Shepard rushed out on a breath, his tongue almost tripping on the words. If that wasn’t a clue that he was nervous, who knew what was?

“You two dated?” he asked stoically.

“Uh yeah, for a while, but then we broke up on good terms. We’re still good friends though.” Shepard visibly fidgeted where he stood. He kept looking to the living room as if wanting to escape this conversation.

“That’s nice then, I’m glad it worked out great for the both of you.” Kaidan shot Shepard a reassuring smile that only seemed to placate some of the man's anxiety.

“So you’re ok with it?” Shepard nearly shrieked.

“Ok with what?” Kaidan asked confused.

“With me being gay.” Shepard closed his eyes bracing himself for Kaidan’s answer. What? Did he think Kaidan had something against him for being gay?

“Yeah, that’s fine with me. I don't care if you’re gay or not.” Kaidan smiled to show him his comfort.

“That- that’s great.” Shepard’s body now relaxed as he smiled. “I-uh I better finish putting together that cage then.”

“Mhm.” Kaidan hummed.

Shepard was able to finish assembling Blasto’s cage and able to place all the toys in the proper places before his friends arrived. Blasto kept running around the cage like a kid in a candy store. You’d think he hit the jackpot. Who knows, he probably did.

Dinner that night was great. Meeting Garrus and Steve was incredible despite the short amount of time they spent talking. They did have a newspaper to work on. So after dinner and a short chat with all three of them, Kaidan went to bed ready to tackled his shift come morning.

Until his phone buzzed on his nightstand indicating someone was calling him. The called ID read, “Rahna.” The night ended with a bitter note when it was supposed to be great. He ignored the call and ignored the grouling ache he still held.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you think?  
> All questions, comments, concerns, etc. Welcomed!!


	7. Illusion/Delusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane's arrival.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I was supposed to be radio silent this month, but when you get plot bunnies (especially sexy, smutty ones), you run with them. This was very much a collaboration chapter. I wrote John and Kaidan's pov's and Cereith did Jane's. Enjoy! -Lucie

**John**

_Shepard couldn’t believe this was happening. It had only been days since he came out to Kaidan, and he had been waiting for the blow back. Not a blowjob. But there he was, lying on his back in bed, the sheets crumpled beneath him as Kaidan placed fluttering kisses down his neck. Gods, those lips were heavenly._

_“Is this okay?” Kaidan asked, the tip of his tongue flicking over a pebbled nipple as it stood erect in the cool morning air._

_Shepard hissed when teeth clamped down around the nub, his cock throbbing against Kaidan’s belly. “Mhm,” was all he could manage as Kaidan continued to lave at his nipple before moving over to the other. “I can’t believe this is happening.”_

_“Believe it, John,” Kaidan breathed out against his skin as he moved lower down his chest._

_Kisses on his abs, then a tongue ran down the thin patch of hair leading into his boxers. Kaidan hooked the tips of his fingers in the waistband and tugged them down, Shepard’s hard cock springing forth in an eager dance of seduction, the tip already beading with moisture._

_Kaidan curled a hand around his shaft and gave a tediously slow stroke, “How long have you wanted me?”_

_He wanted to come right there just from that, from those syrupy words and the feel of that hand holding him tight. Kaidan looked so perfect in the soft light coming through his door, his dark hair tousled from sleep, eyes bright and focused only on him. How did he get so lucky?_

_Shepard ran both hands through Kaidan’s hair rejoicing in the shiver that rolled through Kaidan and into him, “Since we met.”_

_Kaidan let escape a low laugh, “That long? Well, you don’t have to wait anymore.” He licked his full lips while Shepard tried his best not to swallow his own tongue from how insanely hot that was. Then he was lowering his head as he prepared to take him in…._

The phone ringing had John shooting out of bed and shooting off into the very imaginary mouth of a dreamKaidan. “Goddammit!”

He reached over to the side table for his phone and fumbled it before he was able to grab hold. The light of the display hurt his eyes as he squinted to make out the name on the ID. All he could see was the “J” and assumed it was Jack with some sort of emergency with the paper.

“WHAT?” he barked into the receiver as he threw his soiled sheets off his sweaty body. He had to get up and change his boxers anyway.

A velvety voice came through the line, but it wasn’t Jack’s. “Well you don't have to shout! Who pissed in your coffee?”

“Jane?” He looked over to the clock before he began to strip. “And I haven’t had my coffee yet...because it’s five AM!” he stressed. “What’s wrong?” He bent his head and held the phone in the crook of his neck as he fished out another pair of underwear from the drawer. 

“Nothing’s wrong. Why do you always assume the worst? Honestly Johnny, you need to find some inner peace,” she said with a carefree laugh.

“It’s five AM, Jane.” How could she sound so awake? “What I need to find is my pillow.”

“You can sleep when you’re dead. I was just letting you know my flight was coming in a little earlier than I originally told you.”

“How much earlier?” he asked through a loud yawn. 

If he was lucky, he could get a few more hours of sleep in before he had to go get her. She wasn’t scheduled to fly in until tomorrow though, so if he was really lucky, he would get one more good night’s rest before having to deal with Hurricane Jane. He was glad he stocked up on some energy drinks because otherwise, he tended to get left behind. 

He was convinced she had some sort of cybernetic enhancements with the way she buzzed around surviving on nothing but martinis and chocolate. Even as children, she was the one to walk first and talk first, getting into trouble while he crawled around behind her trying to keep up. Things hadn’t changed since they reached adulthood.

“I’m going to be landing in Citadel in about forty-five minutes.”

“Forty-five minutes? Jane, why didn’t you tell me this sooner? That leaves me no time to make coffee!” To be honest, he wasn’t sure if he was actually awake. Maybe this was the nightmare following the wetdream. 

“It was a last minute change. Oh look my flights boarding. I’ll be waiting for you when I land. Gotta run Johnny Boy.”

“Take a cab...hello? Jane?”

John dropped the phone on the bed and threw his head back as he huffed out a breath in an attempt to quell his annoyance. He loved her to death, but she was a handful. And it was far too early to be on Jane duty. But what he was most upset about was her interrupting a perfectly good dream. No one deserved that.

He got dressed in a flash and started to head in the direction of the front door, but stopped mid stride when he heard noise come from Blasto’s cage. They had set up the cage on the second floor of the apartment with a low hanging light that was dim enough for Blasto to be able to navigate his surroundings. He went over to sneak a peek at his little guy before walking out into the cold Citadel morning air. Blasto was currently running a mile minute on his wheel, putting Shepard to shame for his own lack of exercise, and this was coming from a hamster.

“Hey there bud, you’re making me feel like a lazy ass running on that wheel they way you are.” 

Blasto’s ears perked up at the sound of his owner’s voice, but he didn't slow down his marathon sprint. 

“I’m just going to go out and pick up your auntie Jane.” Shepard remembered reading something about hamsters needing to hear their owner’s voice constantly in order for them to get familiar with the sound. So he figured he’d idly talk to Blasto about whatever was on his mind whenever he had the chance. 

After a minute, Blasto slowed down and got off the wheel to scurry over to the water bottle perched up on the cage walls. He drank eagerly as he tried to replenish his body's fluids from the exertion of his morning run.

Shepard chuckled, “I’ll be back soon.” Blasto took a moment to squeak at him as if to say ‘ok’ and that he understood. Who knew, maybe he did. 

With that Shepard left and walked out into the brisk air. The trains had just started running and if he hurried, he could make the first one that stopped. He had intended on leaving a note for Kaidan, but he didn’t have time. If he remembered, he’d try to text him and give him fair warning that Jane was early. He wasn’t ready for Jane to have him yet, but it was the way it had to be, the way it always was.

 

_-_

**Jane**

She walked out of the plane gateway and onto the airport terminal. The airport was sparse with people in the early morning hours. The sun beams shined bright against the white tiled floors and painted walls. She took out her black sunglasses then walked down the airport terminal, past gateways and early riser passengers towards the luggage claiming sections. 

With her head held high, her auburn hair pushed back behind her ears, and her sunglasses reflecting the sun's rays, Jane walked, with purpose and the stature of a goddess, down the airport terminal.

The driver of a luggage carrier stared on at her agape as he crashed into the large white post scattering luggage bags on the floor. A blonde business women overflowed her scorching hot coffee, amazed by Jane’s appearance. Men bumped into walls and women narrowly tripped over their high heels looking at Jane with wonderment.

Those who didn't trip over their own feet or face plant against the walls ran towards the luggage claiming section to help aid Jane in her search for her bag. Men and women throttled one another for the chance to speak with Jane.

Jane came to a halt in front of the ruffled people and released a breath.

“Now, now boys and girls.” She tilted her sunglasses down slightly to look over the rim. “Watch the leather, it's italian,” she said with a sigh.

While the people left standing waged war on one another, Jane grabbed her leather bag off the carousel then started to walk towards the checkpoint when…

“Johnny!” She yelled as she ran towards her older brother, her high heeled boots clacked against the marble floor, her arms were spread open ready to pounce on her brother. She launched herself straight at him making John “umph” in response.

John groaned, “Ugh, don’t just launch yourself at me like that,” John chided once he was able to steady them both without falling.

“Come on, Johnny. I do this every time and you’re still complaining about it.” She had to admit she did like literally throwing herself at her brother knowing that every time he’d be there to catch her and not let her fall. The same could be said about her. Jane wouldn’t let her brother fall, she would be there to catch him if he did. 

“It’s too early for this.” John used a hand to pinch at the bridge of his nose. “Let’s get coffee first. I need it.”

“Starbucks?”

“Starbucks.”

Her brother grabbed her luggage from where she had dropped it. Then they both headed in the direction of the local Starbucks that just so happened to be in the airport they were in, thank god for commercial airlines.

The coffee shop was filled with the usual amount of people this early in the morning. A couple of people where at the counter as they called out things like “Can I help the next person?” and “Next person on line.” or “What would you like sweetheart?” 

Jane hadn’t noticed how fast the line was moving so she didn’t notice that last question was directed at the two of them until John called out their orders from beside her.

“Two coffees, one light and sweet and one regular with two sugars,” John said with his winning smile then added, “Thanks” 

Jane watched as the barista nearly came her pants at John’s smile and the way a blush was peeking out of the hem of her top. The poor young women could barely mutter a “Coming right up, sir,” before she left them to make their orders.

John turned to her and smiled as if to ask if what he ordered her was alright. She sent him a reassuring grin of her own. John always did remember the little things, like how she took her coffee. That’s the way John showed he cared or that he loved someone.

That’s when she realized that John, her loving, caring, amazing, older brother, needed someone to share that love with. Someone who could love him just as much as John would. Steve Cortez was fine for a while, but they never really had that spark of passion between them. However, they did turn out to be incredible friends and it stayed that way after their mutual break up. 

Now though, John was alone. Sure he had his friends and he had Jane, but he didn’t have that special someone.

The barista came back with their orders and John handed her a bill telling the young women to keep the change. 

As they headed out with their coffees in hand, Jane vowed to herself that she would help Johnny find his special someone, determined not to leave Citadel again until she did.

Even if it was the last thing she would ever do.

 

_-_

**Kaidan**

A whole week had passed since Shepard admitted to him that he was gay, a whole week of Kaidan daydreaming about the possibility that they could be together, that Shepard might want him, that all those times that he thought he saw lingering glances and hitches in breath might not have been his imagination. It wasn’t just in his head.

A whole week.

He was thankful that things hadn’t gotten weird between them. Shepard had been pretty busy with getting the Normandy News on the shelves and in the mail that they didn’t have too much time to spend together. Kaidan could tell he was running himself ragged, and he wished he could’ve been more helpful. The days he didn’t work, he made sure that Shepard ate something, and one night, he covered him with a blanket when the poor man fell asleep on the couch. Kaidan had a hard time resisting the urge to join him.

He had to remind himself that just because Shepard was gay, it didn’t mean that he was interested. Of course that was easy to do since Rahna had amped up her game in the last few days. She made it pretty damn difficult for him to forget he was still technically married. Shepard didn’t need someone with that kind of baggage.

But Rahna was the furthest thing on his mind in the moment. He’d just gotten off work and Shepard was nowhere to be found. Kaidan assumed he had left early for work. He wasn’t going to admit how disappointed that made him. Now that things at the paper were settling down, he was hoping they could spend more time together. That was assuming Shepard would want to.

He climbed the stairs to his room, giving a quick holler into Shepard’s room as he passed. When he got no answer, he continued on, striping his shirt and toeing off his boots as he shut his door. His hair smelled like smoke from the early morning call they received and he didn’t bother with a shower at the station. Because what he was about to do, he wanted to do in private.

Reaching in the shower, he turned on the water. Then he unbuttoned his jeans and slipped them passed his thighs where gravity took care of the rest. He stepped out of them and ran his thumb along the elastic of his boxer briefs before tugging them down. Spirits, he was already getting hard.

In the shower was the only place he was brave enough to rub one out. Sure, most people partook in the practice, and the thought of Shepard in his own room with his hand around his cock got his blood boiling, but how embarrassing would it have been if Shepard walked in and caught his roommate of less than two weeks jacking off?

Ironically, that was the exact scenario that was running through his mind as he curled his hand around the rigid flesh of his erection. He started out slow, a swipe of his thumb over the head before his hand would glide down his shaft, the warm water providing the perfect lubrication.

Then he pictured Shepard barging through the door to the bathroom calling his name. Sometimes he’d be angry that Kaidan used the last of the milk, other times he wanted to borrow some hair gel for the hair he didn’t have, but today, imaginary Shepard simply wanted his cock.

He pictured the man throwing back the white vinyl curtain, his chest heaving as those mesmerizing blue eyes took in Kaidan’s naked form. He could feel the veins pulsing against his palm as he sped up his ministrations. Then Shepard would move closer to him, a predatory gaze pinning Kaidan against the tiled wall before his body would, clothes and all.

His head rolled back as his lids grew heavy. He imagined Shepard’s lips fluttering against his pulse point to suck and nip at his wet skin, Shepard’s hand dragging down his abs and joining his to stroke his leaky member. Then Shepard would kiss him, long and hard and full of passion, pressing his body against his from head to toe. The friction of Shepard’s wet clothes would almost be unbearable against his sensitive cock and they’d soon come together into the wet denim of Shepard’s jeans.

All of his muscles seized as he came, the water carrying away all evidence of his fantasy session as he came down from the blissful release.

“Kaidan?” a muffled voice called, and he startled in panic. 

Shit! Had he been too loud? Did Shepard hear what he was doing? He was pretty good at holding in his moans and the sound of the water should have drowned him out, but what if he’d been heard? 

“Are you in the shower?”

“Uh, yeah, but I’m almost done. Just give me a few minutes,” Kaidan hollered back.

“Sorry, I couldn’t hear you,” Shepard said, his clear voice indicating that he’d opened the door. 

Kaidan’s heart was pounding so loud in his ears that he could no longer hear the sound of the water hitting the floor. What if Shepard had come in to join him? He wouldn’t be ready to go again for at least twenty minutes. No, that was just silly. He wasn’t that lucky. 

“I don’t mean to interrupt, I just wanted to let you know that Jane is here.”

“I thought she wasn’t scheduled to arrive until tomorrow?”

“That’s Jane for you. She blows in like a hurricane almost always unexpected and leaves a disaster area in her wake,” Shepard said, a fond yet tired chuckle sending Kaidan mixed messages. “That won’t be a problem will it?”

“No, no problem. I’m excited to meet her,” Kaidan replied, trying not to think about the fact that there was only a flimsy piece of plastic between his naked body and Shepard.

“Okay, I’ll let you finish up. I’ll get started on breakfast.”

“Thanks.”

As soon as he heard the door close, he let out a relieved sigh. His body was still thrumming from his orgasm, but he had to hurry. He was excited to meet Jane. Shepard talked about her a lot, and he knew they were close. He was hoping he’d be able to learn more about Shepard from Jane.

He turned off the shower then toweled off. Why did he feel like he was meeting a boyfriend’s parents? He was nervous and hoped he didn’t make a fool of himself in front of Jane. Once he was dressed in jeans and a Dr. Who t-shirt, he stared downstairs.

The smell of coffee and bacon met him halfway. He wasn’t ready to admit it, but Mindor Mountain Roast was starting to grow on him. When he got to the kitchen, both Shepard’s were standing at the stove with their backs toward him deep in an argument.

“I don’t see how you can eat it like that?” he overheard Jane say.

“I like it crispy. I thought you did too?” Shepard countered.

Jane scoffed, “Crispy, not burnt to ashes, Johnny.”

“It’s not burnt,” Shepard insisted, “But you’re out voted here anyway because Kaidan and I both like it this way...not limp.”

Jane snickered at that, “Oh, this Kaidan guy likes it _hard_ and crispy too, huh?”

Kaidan didn’t know what she had been implying, but he thought it was time to stop eavesdropping. “Hey guys, smells good.”

They both turned around and he was blinded by their very similar grins, Jane’s turning more impish as she scrutinized him. “Did you two plan this or do your nerd brains sync naturally?”

That’s when Kaidan realized Shepard was also wearing a Dr. Who shirt. Their eyes locked and everything else seemed to slip away, Shepard’s grin fading into something warm and cozy, and Kaidan wanted to crawl inside it and never leave.

But he was forced to when his phone buzzed in his pocket. Rahna. He didn’t have to look to know who was calling; she had a knack for ruining the moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Happy Thanksgiving if you celebrate that sort of thing, or happy random Thursday if you don't. <3


	8. Eggs, Bacon, and Broken Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John, Kaidan, and Jane have breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry for the slow updates, but things have been a little busy for us both. Thanks for hanging in there. This is another mixed chapter, Cereith wrote Jane while I wrote John's pov. Hope you enjoy! -Lucie

**Jane**

“Hey guys, smells good,” came a honey filled voice from behind them.

Jane and John both turned around to look at the new occupant. Her eyes settle on the most handsome man she had ever seen. Her grin slowly turned impish as she looked down at what the man was wearing.

“Did you two plan this or do your nerd brains sync naturally?” she teased, knowing that her brother wore a similar shirt. The man looked puzzled for a bit at her remark until his eyes settled on her brother.

Jane turned to her brother and was surprised at the warmly lit expression he was giving the man. Looking back to the man, Jane saw a similar expression on his face. They both looked to be in their own little world. Just the two of them. For some reason the way they looked at one another made Jane think there was something between them. Something strong. She didn’t want to interfere; she’d stop breathing if it gave John and this man their private moment, their own little slice of time.

Until a startling ring came from the man’s pants pocket, ruining the spell they both had on each other. The man’s face turned grim, his smile faltered, faded to a shadow of what it previously was just seconds ago as he looked at his phone before declining the call. Quickly glancing at John, she saw that his smile had also evaporated.

What had them both feeling this way? They were both fine until that phone rang. Whoever it was calling the man, it probably wasn’t someone good, if going by the man’s look was anything to go by.

Maybe it was an ex-girlfriend calling? No, that would mean that the guy was straight and that the moment they just had was one sided, except that moment was not one sided, both men looked at each other in such a way that it could not be one sided. Boyfriend then?

Jane saw the way John’s jaw muscles twitched. It was the tale tell sign that he was about to blurt something out. Maybe he was about to demand to know who the caller was if he didn’t already know. Jane knew she had to interfere before her brother potentially ruined something that could become…more.

“Sorry about the nerd comment, I didn’t mean anything by it,” she quickly said before John could get a word in edgewise. “I always tease John about that Doctor show he watches.”

She sent the man one of her charming award-winning smiles. The man’s mood lifted a little as he laughed to himself. “It’s fine, I know it wasn’t meant to mean anything,” he said.

“My name’s Jane, by the way, Jane Shepard.” She outstretched her hand for the man to shake in introduction.

He grasped her hand. “Kaidan Alenko, CFD.”

“Oh, Citadel Fire Department,” She gave him a more normal than firm handshake. “Thank you for your heroism.”

Kaidan nodded before releasing.

“Thanks, that’s some firm handshake you got there,” Kaidan said as he tried to discreetly rub his hand.

“A girl’s got to stay in shape,” she said with a wink. She wasn’t flirting with Kaidan, but she needed to confirm her assumption that the moment they shared wasn’t one sided. When Kaidan didn’t react the way she thought he would it was a pretty safe bet that Kaidan only had eyes for her brother.

Kaidan and Jane both sat side by side in front of Shepard as he prepared their eggs, bacon, and toast.

“Oh my god, John,” she said, looking down at the dark burnt bacon. “I said to make it crispy not burnt.”

“This is crispy.” He scooped up the pieces of bacon from the pan and put them onto the plate with the rest of the pile he had made. He grabbed two more strips of bacon from the package, but before John could start to fry them Jane quickly walked around and took over cooking. She might as well make it the way she would like to eat it.

“See you’re just making the bacon all flimsy,” John playfully said once Jane had her bacon cooked to a golden brown.

“Well excuse me your royal highness, but I like my bacon this way.”

“Yeah, all limp.”

“This isn’t limp, it’s crispy.” She gestured to the plate of bacon John had made a minute ago, “I bet Kaidan here doesn’t like burnt bacon either.”

“Oh yeah, I bet he’d like my bacon over your undercooked ones.”

They both turned to the man and said, “Right Kaidan!”

Kaidan looked at both of the Shepard twins and couldn’t help but laugh and laugh and laugh at the way they were acting towards each other. He laughed so much so that he almost fell off his stool.

John and Jane joined in with some giggling of their own before Jane quickly finished up her batch of bacon and started to make their eggs while John made the toast. Since they both liked their eggs cooked the same way it didn’t take Jane long to make the scramble eggs with a little milk mix in. Once all the toast and eggs were done they each grabbed a plate and moved to the dining room and turned on the TV news for some added background noise and to see if anything interesting came up.

“So what are you doing today Jane?” John asked around a mouth full of eggs and toast. Kaidan giggled at him.

“Not sure,” Jane took a fork eggs and ate it before speaking, “I might go to the Presidium Mall to get some new clothes.”

“Ok,” John took a piece of bacon from his pile and ate it in one go, “and you Kaidan? You have your day off today right?”

John looked down at Kaidan’s plate and saw that he had not just John’s cooked bacon, but also his sisters.

“Yeah, I don’t really have anything to do today though. So I think I’ll just stay home.” Kaidan scooped up a fork full of eggs into his mouth.

“Hey, you could come with me. I’d like to have a shopping buddy,” Jane said. She didn’t think it would be right to leave Kaidan at the apartment alone while John was out to work.

“Yeah, sure I wouldn’t mind. You’ll have to buy me an outfit though,” he joked.

“Knowing Jane she probably will though, fair warning,” John said looking at Kaidan.

“I was uh just joking,” he said looking over at Jane.

“I know, but I wouldn’t mind either. We can go after breakfast.”

 

_=_

 

**John**

They finished their breakfast in silence as they watched the news. It was always so dull he didn’t know how most people could stand it. He had dreams to expand into other forms of media from the magazine, but he was so hands on with the paper that he didn’t have time. Maybe some day he’d find a way to grow.

Jane and Kaidan offered to do the cleanup while he went to get changed for work. Unlike Jane, he didn’t roll out of bed looking like a billionaire. He climbed the stairs and tried to screw the lid on his feelings of jealousy as their laughter followed him up, but it was already starting to boil over.

He really needed to get a hold of himself. Kaidan was a grown man, not his property, not his boyfriend, and not anything else of his other than his roommate. He was free to date whomever he liked…even if that happened to be his twin sister. Jane was incredible, so charismatic and captivating, so he understood.

Truth was, Kaidan was a good man. John could see that. He was the kind of man he wanted his sister to end up with, which meant he was perfect for her really. But that brought him little comfort. He was struggling even though he knew that was going to happen.

The whole scenario played out in his mind several times before her arrival. Jane would visit, her and Kaidan would have amazing chemistry, and they’d fall in love on a romantic shopping excursion. Maybe she’d whisk Kaidan away to travel the world, or maybe she’d finally have something worth staying home for. She’d be happy, Kaidan would be happy, and that’s really all he could ever hope for.

So why did it hurt so bad, a deep ache seated just below his sternum? It burned and it stung and it had him so distracted that he almost put on his tuxedo pants after reaching for them in the closet. He was not equipped to handle this.

Unlike him who was so gay, Jane was bisexual, which was great because she leaned quite a bit towards women. That kept them mostly out of the same dating pool, but Kaidan was a wildcard. John was pretty sure those brown eyes could turn the Pope queer. Or more importantly, capture the eye—and heart—of his sister.

After he slipped on his favorite pair of jeans in a half assed attempt to boost his mood, he went into the bathroom to shave. He thought about skipping it since he was already behind schedule, but he needed a few moments to concentrate on something other than the sound of his heart breaking into pieces. Maybe shaving wasn’t the best way to go about distracting himself because he ended up nicking himself a few times.

How did he get so far gone? He’d only known Kaidan a few weeks, yet it had felt like a lifetime, but he knew that even the rest of his life wouldn’t be enough time to spend with someone like him. Not just someone like him but actually him, Kaidan, with his syrupy voice and those adorable eyebrows and he won’t even get started on that body with the perfect set of his shoulders and swell of his ass.

He left the bathroom and put on the Dr. Who shirt he’d tossed on the bed when he came in the room. He had thought about changing into something a little more business appropriate, but he was the boss. And the thought of him and Kaidan wearing similar attire made him feel warm inside. Joker was going to tease him about it, he was more of a fan of the older episodes, but he didn’t care much about that. He could give as good as he got. But he was starting to think Garrus was on to him.

He was Shepard’s best friend, of course he was going to pick up on the heart eyes he had been walking around with lately. Thought he hoped Garrus would be too blinded by the ones in his own eyes to notice. It was only a matter of time before others picked up on it. He was not looking forward to that. His staff—his friends—had a tendency to meddle, but there was nothing to be done about his situation.

He’d need to find a way to get over the little crush he had on his roommate before anyone found out, but how exactly was one supposed to get over those eyes?

“Hey Johnny, we’re heading out,” Jane said from the doorway, startling him from his reverie. 

“Hmm?”

“Kaidan and I are leaving, and please don’t tell me you’re wearing that shirt to work.” She shook her head as she folded her arms across her chest, bright green eyes scrutinizing his ensemble.

“What’s wrong with it?”

“I’ll pick you up some things while we’re out. You never could dress yourself.”

It was a testament to his sheer force of will that he didn’t grimace when she said “we’re.” He was going to do his best to be supportive of them, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t smash his heart to pieces. “Sure, Jane,” he said rolling his eyes. He knew it was no use arguing with her.

“Are you going to come down and see us off?”

“You’re going shopping, not to Paris.” 

“Now that’s a thought, shopping in Paris,” she winked. 

“Sure you don’t want to skip work and join us, Shepard?” Kaidan asked, coming to stand behind Jane in the doorway. 

“I should really get to work. That place would fall down without me,” he chuckled, trying not to think about what a cute couple they would make.

“I doubt that, but suit yourself,” Jane said, shooting John a disapproving glare. She turned around and grabbed Kaidan by the wrist, dragging him along behind her. “Come on, Kaidan. One of Johnny’s credit cards is burning a hole in my pocket,” she hollered back, more for his benefit than Kaidan’s.

He sat down on his bed and slipped his shoes on as he listened to their murmurs dying down. He didn’t know why he was so upset over them, it wasn’t like he had a chance with Kaidan anyway. Maybe it was time to let his staff start setting him up with people like they were always bugging him about. Or worse...maybe it was time to take Kai Leng back.


	9. Encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane and Kaidan make it to the Presidium Mall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,  
> I don't know how to express my deepest apologies for taking such a long time to get this chapter out. I can't promise that this won't happen again, but with my summer break coming up soon who knows. Thank you to those who are waiting patiently for these chapters.   
> I hope you like this chapter! Next chapter will be Lucie's!  
> -Cereith  
> :D

**Jane**

Just one day off from work wouldn’t kill him. Why couldn’t he just say, “Sure, I’ll go with you guys.” The Normandy News wouldn't go up in flames if John spent the day with them. Though that wasn’t what was nagging at Jane, it was the way John was acting about it. Like it absolutely irritated him at the idea of going out with her and Kaidan, but why? John never once complained about going shopping with her, so why was this time so different? Could it be because of Kaidan? Did he not like going out with Kaidan or something? Or was it just…

“Hey Jane, you alright?” Kaidan asked.

“Hmm?” Jane hummed, apparently she’d been so deep in thought that she didn't realize they had already stepped into the building’s elevator and had started to descend down towards the parking garage. “Sorry, I was just thinking about John.”

“Yeah me too. I really wanted him to come with us. It would have been just like when we went to the pet store,” Kaidan said with a small smile.

“You and John went to the pet store together?” Jane asked.

“Yeah, it was so we could buy Blasto his cage and supplies.” 

So John didn’t have a problem going out with Kaidan either. Then why was this time around a problem?

The elevator door dinged opened, prompting them that they had reached the garage level.

“Damn, I forgot I don’t have my car here,” Jane said as she looked around in hopes that her car would magically appear in the garage.

“That’s fine, we can take mine,” Kaidan said as he took out his car keys from his pants pocket.

Once they were in the car they silently drove down the Citadel streets towards the Presidium Mall. Jane couldn't help but be captivated by the city’s beauty as they drove, so she didn’t notice that they were arriving at their destination. Kaidan headed in the direction of the Mall’s parking lot. Jane was about to grab some money to pay for the parking fee, but before she could Kaidan was already handing a twenty dollar bill to person at the booth. 

Jane didn’t say anything until they started to proceed further into the parking lot. “You didn’t have to pay for that you know. I invited you.”

“True, but I thought it would only be fair since you offered to buy me a whole set of clothes,” Kaidan said as he found a spot closest to the Mall elevators.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get a set of clothes that will be sure to make Johnny do a double take if he hasn’t already,” she said, wanting to see how Kaidan would react.

“Huh?” Kaidan didn’t seem to have heard her so she just laughed to herself then told Kaidan not to worry about it.

While they waited for the elevator to arrive Jane quickly thought of what she’d have to get. Her travels had forced her to pack light and because of the tropical weather of the places she’d visited, that wasn't much of an issue. The weather in Citadel was getting colder so she’d need some warmer clothes. Jane was so deep in thought that when the elevator arrived she accidently bumped into a woman, knocking a shopping bag from her hands.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Jane said as she knelt down to pick up the woman's bag, “I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

Jane stood and handed the bag over to the woman, but she wasn’t looking over at Jane. The women was looking over at, “Kaidan!”

Kaidan looked at the woman in shock, but underlying it was pain. “Ra-rahna, what you doing here?”

“What am I doing here?” the woman, Rahan, mocked. “The better question is why haven't you been answering my calls?”

“I-uhm, I...” Kaidan could barely make a sentence in the face of this woman. His ever growing pain now more evident on his face.

“And who’s this bitch!” Rahna asked looking over at Jane in disgust. “She bumped into me! Oh and now she’s stealing my stuff! Give me that!” Rahna wrenched the bag from Jane’s outstretched hand.

“Excuse me?” Any sympathy Jane had for Rahna was lost as Jane stared at this woman in disbelief.

“Kaidan, who is this person?” Rahna asked, ignoring Jane completely.

“She’s my roommates sister, Jane.” Kaidan said in a hushed tone.

“Oh is she now?” she said incredulously, “and when exactly did you move in with your ‘roommate,’ don't lie to me Kaidan! You’re fucking her aren't you?!”

“What!? No, I-I.”

“Haven’t you made me suffer enough,” she yelled.

Kaidan was momentarily startled by Rahna’s yell. Luckily there wasn’t anyone within earshot, but that didn’t mean that no one happened upon them. Jane thought she should calm down the situation before it escalated any further.

“Hey,” Jane said placently, “why don’t we all just take a breath and--”

“You stay out of this!” Rahna shrieked as she lifted her hand to strike at Jane. However, Jane shot out her hand to stop Rahna’s hand midair then pushed Rahna backwards. 

“Why you, do you know who I am? I’m Kaidan’s...”

“You’re Kaidan’s ‘wife’, yeah I know,” Jane said.

“You do?” Kaidan asked confused.

“I noticed the raised skin on your finger while we were having breakfast with my brother,” Jane was not about to give this woman her brother's name. “I didn't think much of it at the time, but now I guess it makes sense. You’re going through a divorce.”

Jane turned to Kaidan and didn’t show him pity or sympathy, just concern. Concern for what Kaidan might be going through, what could have caused him so much heartache, and concern for what might happen afterwards.

“You don’t know what you’re talking ab-” 

“I suggest you leave before you cause even more of a scene.” Jane tilted her head in the direction of the people gathering on the other side of the parking lot.

Rahna made a humph noise then looked at Kaidan. “We’ll talk later, when we have more privacy.” She looked at Jane with disgust before turning and heading towards her car.

They stood there in silence long after Rahna had left them. Jane was waiting for Kaidan to collect himself and speak first.

“I’m… I’m really sorry about this Jane.” Kaidan rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I’ll pack my bags as soon as possible and you’ll-”

“Pack your bags?” Jane interrupts. “What do you mean?”

“Well yeah, to move out. After what you just saw I wouldn’t blame you if you and John didn’t want me living at the apartment anymore.”

Jane could see the broken hearted man before her now. Kaidan was damaged, insecure, and he punished himself for it, but what made it worse was that he most likely wasn’t at fault for whatever happened between him and his wife.

“Kaidan listen,” Jane waited until Kaidan looked at her, “We’re not going to kick you out or anything like that just because you’re going through a tough time.”

Kaidan seemed to be pondering for a response but couldn’t come up with one.

“Now,” Jane sighed, “Why don’t we continue with our plans for the day.”

Kaidan gave her a tentative smile, “Sure, i’d like that.”

They both rode the elevator up to the main floor of the Mall. The interior of the Mall was a very beautiful setting. Jane would always be fascinated by it every time she visited. The glass ceiling letting in the bright daylight and various greenery spread across the Presidium Mall made it feel as if they were outside. The people would lounge around on the many benches located throughout the Mall. The Presidium Mall wasn’t just a shopping center, it was a place where people could just sit and relax, where people could meet up with friends and have a cup of coffee, or where someone could go to escape their troubles for just a few hours. 

“Hey, why don't we stop for a cup off coffee,” Jane pointed to the nearby coffee shop, “I could use one after what just happened.”

“I could use a quick fix and an eclair right about now,” Kaidan let out a light laugh.

They both walked over to the coffee shop and waited in line to order. Once they had their coffees and eclairs in hand they sat in one of the available booths near the windows that looked out onto the Mall. Jane was so intently looking out the window that she didn't notice Kaidan was getting ready to speak.

“I’m divorcing my wife because she cheated on me.” Kaidan blurted out momentarily startling Jane. She turned to look at Kaidan staring into his cup of coffee. He looked like it pained him to have to say the words out loud for the public ears to hear. 

“I’m sorry that happened to you Kaidan.” Jane looking down at her own cup, trying to find the right words to say to Kaidan. 

“Don’t be,” Kaidan hiccupped, “I should’ve seen it coming. I mean if i had maybe i could of……” He hiccuped again, “This- this was all-”

“This was not your fault,” Jane almost yelled. The conviction no less evident in her tone. 

“It’s not.” She said once more with finality.

Kaida didn’t respond. He only looked back down with a small smile hidden just barely out of Jane’s sight. They sat there silently until they were finally ready to continue on with their plans for day.


	10. Surprise!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang throws Jane a welcome home party, and John gets a phone call he absolutely should not answer....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's certainly been awhile on this one, hasn't it? Oops, sorry. I blame it all on Ceireth. ;) And I'm pretty sure we mostly forgot where we were going with this, soooooo... yeah. Enjoy!

**John**

 

Shepard had a long day at work, and he was smart enough to know it had more to do with the fact that Jane and Kaidan spent all day together than it did with the slight decline in sales for the last quarter. He’d called Jane to check in at lunch time and had to listen to them joking around without him. But he’d be okay because he wanted them both to find happiness.

“Ready to go, Shepard?” Garrus asked as he leaned against the doorframe of his office.

He sighed and shut his laptop. “Might as well. There’s nothing I can do about the numbers today.”

“That’s the spirit. We’ll stop by the liquor store and pick up the beer on the way to your apartment. Jack said she’d handle plates and cups. Then there’s--”

“Wait, what?”

“For the party tonight. Tali’s making a cheese plate even though she’s lactose intolerant. Isn’t she great?” 

Shepard wanted to hate how in love they were, but he couldn’t. Just because he’d never find love didn’t mean he didn’t want it for the people he cared about the most. 

“What party?”

“Jane’s Welcome Home party. I figured she’d already ran it by you, buuut I can tell she didn’t by that beautiful face you’re making.”

“No, she didn’t tell me,” John snapped. He wasn’t opposed to a party in theory, but he had visions of Jane’s arm looped through Kaidan’s as she dragged him around the dance floor, alcohol flowing, bodies writhing… it was going to be torture. “Where’s this party taking place?” Not that he had to ask; he already knew.

“Your apartment.”

He groaned as he grabbed his messenger bag to stuff his computer into. “This is just like her. She makes plans and tells everyone but me.”

“She doesn’t like to burden you.”

“Or she doesn’t like me talking her out of all her _brilliant_ ideas.”

“Yeah, that sounds like you.”

“Not helping.”

“It’s just a party. We haven’t had one in awhile, and I think we deserve to let off some steam… besides, everyone already knows, so good luck trying to cancel,” Garrus said, smirking when Shepard realized he was right.

“Fine, but you’re helping with the cleanup.”

_-_

“Where’s Grunt with the ice?” Shepard asked. “I can’t fit anything else in the fridge.”

“Calm down, Shepard,” Grunt said. “I'm right here.”

“Finally!” Shepard spun and found Grunt holding a bag of chips in his hands. “Grunt… where’s the ice?”

“It’s downstairs in the car,” Grunt mumbled around the fist full of chips he’d just stuffed into his mouth.

“You were supposed to bring the ice upstairs. And stop eating those!” He plucked the bag of chips out of Grunts hands making the larger man pout. “They're for the rest of the guests.” 

“No one was down there to help me bring it up here.” Grunt tried to reach around for the bag behind Shepard. “Can I get that back? There's more in the car.”

“Fine,” he said with a sigh. Shepard never could say ‘no’ to Grunt. 

“Hey, Shepard,” Garrus called out. “We’re done over here. Need anything else done?”

“Yeah, could you help Grunt bring up the rest of the snacks and the ice.”

“Sure thing.” Garrus and Grunt both headed out of the apartment to get the rest of the supplies need for Jane’s welcome home party as Shepard’s phone buzzed with a text from Jane.

**(Jane) How’s the party planning going? :)**

**(Shepard) You’re not supposed to know about the party, remember. >:(**

**(Jane) Oops, right.**

**(Shepard) Aren't you out with Kaidan. Shouldn't you be having a good time instead of checking up on how the “surprise” party is going?**

If Shepard was ever so lucky, he wouldn't waste a second while he was out with Kaidan on a date. 

**(Jane) FYI, we are having a good time and i'm just checking to see if you want us to bring anything?**

_Just pour some salt on the wound, why don't ya._

**(Shepard) No, it's fine. We got it covered. Just get here in an hour or so.**

**(Jane) Mkay. Kaidan says hi btw. See you in an hour. Luv ya! <3**

It didn't take long for Grunt and Garrus to bring up the rest of the supplies from Grunt’s car. Once they had what they needed, Shepard started setting out food and drinks on the table for everyone. He made sure to make space on one of the counter tops for the Strawberry truffle cake that he left in the fridge. In under an hour all the preparations were done. All that was left was for Kaidan and Jane to show up.

Part of Shepard didn't want to see Kaidan and Jane walk in together. It would be foreshadowing of Kaidan coming in through the door carrying Jane on their wedding day, and Shepard didn't want to go through that, but it's not like he could just leave. What kind of brother would he be to Jane if he couldn't tough out a bad situation for her sake? 

God, maybe he was blowing this way out of proportion. Jane, married? No, the whole wedding thing was all in his head. Just because Kaidan and Jane looked like a cute couple together didn't mean anything….

“Shh, quiet down everyone,” Joker called out, bringing Shepard out of his thoughts. “I think I hear them coming down the hall.”

Shepard went over to turn off the living room lights. 

“Remember to yell out surprise when they come in,” James said.

“We've all been to a surprise party, James,” Steve whispered. 

“Hey, just making sure.”

Liara and Tali tried to contain their laughter as they all wait for Kaidan and Jane to enter. Everyone heard the jingle of the keys as the lock engaged. Other than that, it was silent, as if everyone was holding their breaths. Kaidan and Jane came in talking, unaware of the people hidden in the dark room.

“Why is it so dark in here?” Kaidan asked.

At that Shepard turned on the lights, and everyone yelled, “SURPRISE! WELCOME HOME JANE!” 

A chorus of cheers and laughs erupted throughout the apartment, and Shepard rolled his eyes at Jane’s fake surprised expression. 

“Aww, guys you shouldn't have.” Her gaze landed on Shepard, and they exchanged smiles. It was truly a happy moment for Shepard. He’d missed her so much when she went away. 

Kaidan had startled but recovered fast and began to laugh and smile with the rest of them. Shepard forced himself to look away, otherwise he might’ve spent the whole night trapped in Kaidan’s smile.

Shepard grabbed two bottles of beer from the cooler and went over to him. “Welcome home, Kaidan,” he said as he handed the bottle of beer over to him. 

“Thanks, Shepard.” They clinked their bottles together and toasted before taking a swig. “So, this is Jane’s surprise party? She didn't seem too surprised.”

“It takes a lot to pull one over on her,” Shepard admitted. “And we kind of do these every time she comes back from traveling for the paper. It just turned into this long running joke, because she always knew we would throw one when she returned.”

“I’ve never heard of someone planning their own surprise party, but I guess if anyone could do it, it would be your sister,” Kaidan said. “She is an amazing women. 

Shepard gave him a small smile. “Come on let me introduce you to everyone. These guys are the ones that write the paper you like so much.” 

They made the rounds, and it didn't take long for Kaidan to get comfortable amongst his friends, in their home. Kaidan definitely had a lot to talk about with he and Jane’s friends. It helped that he knew every issue of the paper inside and out. He’d give his comments on his favorite columns, issues, and article, and who doesn’t like getting a bit of praise for a job well done? 

Once Shepard felt comfortable that the group wouldn’t eat Kaidan alive, he snuck off to refill the snack bowls. Grunt had _conveniently_ forgotten to eat on the way over and had devoured half the snacks like a ravenous black hole.

“Hey Shepard, come join us.“ He turned around to find Kaidan leaning a hip against the bar. His cheeks looked warm from the alcohol, and Shepard guessed he had a nice buzz going by the crooked smile on his face, that he most certainly did _not_ want to kiss off. “We're going to play a game of poker. I might win some cash tonight.”

“I’ll….” Shepard’s phone rang interrupting him. “Sorry, I need to take this.”

“But you’ll come after?”

“Uh, maybe. I should probably restock the food. Grunt’s getting grumpy.” He heard a slight rumbling from the other room that sounded like his name. Honestly, half his paycheck when to feeding that boy.

“Oh, okay, sure.” Kaidan sounded slightly disappointed, but Jane would keep him company.

Shepard took a breath and steadied himself as he looked down at the caller ID.

_Kai Leng_

**Author's Note:**

> Bother us on the tumblr: [ArcticLucie,](http://arcticlucie.tumblr.com) [Cereith.](http://commandercereith.tumblr.com)


End file.
